Solution Lady: Accepting the Loss of Divorce

    So you’re divorced, newly single and not ok with it. I know that most people feel that way, especially at the very beginning of a separation. Some even feel that way after a few years. You are not alone, though.        
      
According to 2005 Canadian statistics, (where I live), there were more 13,486,224 million singles. There were 15,653,382 adults currently married, 1,553,103 widowed, 1,577,798 divorced and 13,486,224 singles. (For more Canadian information, check out this link to the Census 2005 Brief: Marital Status http://www40.statcan.ca/l01/cst01/famil01.htm) So, now you know you are not alone. 

But knowing that you’re not alone isn’t enough to help you move forward after going through a divorce. So what do you do when you can’t stand your new situation, and when you can’t take what’s happening to you and your world. Well, these next tips should be helpful to you. 

SIX WAYS TO MOVE FORWARD     

1. Acknowledge the feelings.
Feel them, talk about them, write about them. 

2. Don’t change your routine too much.
Continue to do what you normally do, as much as possible. 

3. Accept the loss and learn the lessons.
Adopt a learning perspective and consider what you’ve learned from this experience. 

4. Take it one day at a time.
Don’t look too much into the future. Live in the moment and for the day. 

5 Believe in something much higher than yourself.
Consider that your situation happened for a reason and that you have something much better to look forward to. 
 
6. Know that in time, you’ll be in a better place.
The sooner you accept the situation, the sooner you’ll be able to move forward with your life.



Linda G. Robert M.A., M.Ed., is known as The Solution Lady for personal, self-care, wellness and life solutions. She's worked in the mental health field and education field for several years as well as in law enforcement. Find out more about her at www.lindarobert.ca. Check out her newest booklet at http://www.myarticles.thesolutionlady.com/index.html.