Tips to Deal with a Mid-Life Crisis

    Are you dealing with a spouse who is having a mid-life crisis? Are you the spouse who is going through a mid-life crisis? If you are in either position, it can be a difficult time for your spouse and your family, experts say.

"Mid-life crisis happens when people realize life does not go on forever, and they panic about things they haven't achieved -- whether it be career goals, staying youthful, or whatever their definition of happiness is," said Dr. Tina Tessina, a California psychotherapist and author of "Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things that Can Ruin your Marriage.""Often, the spouse gets lumped in with whatever is making them unhappy, so they look for something else to reassure them."

Tessing said a mid-life crisis is really a "masked fear of aging and death." And that fear is being worsened by the "intense focus on youth and beauty in advertising and the media." Here are some tips to help if you or a spouse are dealing with this issue in your life.


IF YOU ARE HAVING A MID-LIFE CRISIS: Tips from Phyllis Goldberg, Ph.D. and Rosemary Lichtman, Ph.D.

1. Work with a professional.
He or she can help you understand what's causing your inner turmoil. Change what you can in order to feel more grounded. Don't act on the pleasure principal: 'I want what I want when I want it.'

2. Recognize that there are consequences for your behavior.
Those consequences will have an impace on you and your family.


IF YOU ARE DEALING WITH SOMEONE HAVING A MID-LIFE CRISIS: Tips from Phyllis Goldberg, Ph.D. and Rosemary Lichtman, Ph.D.

1. Try to be understanding.
Try to understand and support your partner.

2. Set some boundaries to protect your family.
See a couples therapist and focus on how your relationship affects and isaffected by the mid-life crisis.

3. Take care of your own needs.