Book Review: How to Survive Marriage

    Married? Here's some advice on coping with life’s challenges from the book "How to Survive Your Marriage" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've done it:

“Most difficult thing in marriage: The stress of trying to have a baby. We didn’t have problems getting pregnant, but rather staying pregnant. I had an ectopic pregnancy and had to have all these surgeries and my own health was becoming an issue. There was the loss of work and wages as a result. The stress of the situation kind of took the fun out of sex. Getting so uptight about getting pregnant doesn’t help the situation at all.”
-- J.B.H., Alexandria, Va.

“You have to be supportive of your spouse no matter what. The two of you really are a team. If he really wants to do something—like change jobs—that at first blush you are not sure about, you still have to be supportive. Hopefully he is the same way with you. When I told my husband that I wanted to go back to school a couple years ago I was worried about what he might say. But he was behind me 100 percent and that made me feel wonderful.”
-- Charlene Depasquale, Pittsburgh

“I was with the same woman for 11 years, married to her for one year. She was unfaithful with my best friend. I kicked her out. You have to have a lot of faith if you’re with somebody for that long. Everybody thinks the person they’re with long-term would never, ever do anything like that, but it’s not always true.”
-- Anonymous, Atlanta

“The 7-year itch won’t happen if you have different interests. My husband and I are 8eightyears into our marriage and are doing fine because we pursue our own interests, friends and activities while still spending time with each other. I don’t have to be with him every weekend and vice versa. I make plans with girlfriends or take min-ivacations with them to get out of town for a night or two. It makes the time we do spend together more special.”
-- Staci Kessler, Highland Park, Ill.

“If you’re thinking about leaving your marriage to find someone better, know that there is no “better,” just different. Someone told me this and it has been very helpful. I think for us, staying married all this time (and we’ve had our difficulties) has had a lot to do with taking the commitment seriously. We feel like the commitment we have made is central to who we are and if we couldn’t make that work, we would be disappointed.”
-- Naomi Nemtzow, Brooklyn, N.Y.

“Be on guard with your spouse at high school and college reunions. That is a time for temptations, when many people rekindle relationships with old boyfriends and girlfriends. My husband renewed his relationship with his old college girlfriend at that time. He divorced me and eventually married her.”
-- Anonymous, San Antonio

“Just remember, whatever it is that you’re going through, you’ll come out stronger on the other side.”
-- J.W.A. III, Atlanta

Hundreds of Heads Books’ survival guides offer the wisdom of the masses by assembling the experiences and advice of hundreds of people who have gone through life’s biggest challenges and have insight to share. Visit www.hundredsofheads.com to share your advice or get more information.