What can you do to keep him from cheating in your relationship? Infidelity expert Ruth Houston
, whose first marriage broke up after her husband cheated on her, gives these three tips to help.
1. Define cheating so both partners know what to expect.
“Don’t assume someone has the same values as you,” Houston said. “You need to establish the ground rules to begin with so they know there will be consequences if they cheat.”
2. Keep your finger on the pulse of a relationship.
“It’s easy to get distracted by jobs, chores, children,” Houston said. If he’s talking about a female co-worker a lot, pay attention to what he says. Make certain you attend any office functions, make your presence known and watch how he interacts with the women in the room. Join him in his hobbies or his sports, so you can keep your relationship bond strong. “Many potential cheaters will not cheat unless the opportunity arises,” she said. “Sometimes you do have to make it inconvenient for him to cheat.” 3. Know his friends.
If he’s hanging around with friends who cheat on their wives, find new friends for him. “Develop close relationships with couples who value their marriage vows,” Houston said. “If nobody in your social circle is having an affair, then the temptation is much less likely.”
Once you know he’s cheating, Houston said, spouses should “Speak up. Let him know there will be consequences, or he’ll do it again If he realizes, there is hell to pay for cheating, then he’ll think twice about it.”
And if you haven’t married him yet? Houston’s advice: “If a woman finds she’s dating a potential cheater and she’s looking for a serious relationship, she needs to drop him like a bad habit. If you know there’s a likelihood he would cheat on you, why would you want to invest your time?”MORE FROM DIVORCE360
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