Mrs. Detective: Is My Spouse Cheating?

Q:  I think my spouse may be cheating, how can I tell? 

A: There are several signs to look for if you think your spouse may be cheating on you, but let’s face it you know them better than anyone. We can usually sense when our spouse is unfaithful, we don’t need signs. I am not just talking to you as a private investigator, but as someone who has been there and done that. I am remarried now, and but I drove in and out of the parking lot of a private investigator’s office three times before I went in and hired him to follow my former husband. My advice to you is to do it and get the closure, so that you can move on without wondering or feeling guilty.            

I had a feeling that my ex was cheating on me. At the time, I was not a private investigator. I saw a sign for a private investigator in the community I lived in. Well, I drove in that parking lot three times and changed my mind all three times; little did I know that this man was going to be my future husband and soul mate. Wow, there is a happy ending before you even hear the whole story. 

I was always fascinated by private investigating, and with my ex, I became an amateur one, but do not do that. If you gather the facts yourself, in many states it is not admissible in court, and you can be charged with stalking. But I am getting a bit ahead of myself.  Let me tell you the signs of a cheating spouse. Here they are:  

1. No longer interested in intimacy?
Does he or she come home smelling like perfume or cologne or have makeup stains on his clothes? Well if you don’t use perfume or cologne or makeup, guess what. Working a lot of hours, going to work early. Spending a lot of time on the computer, and suddenly he or she now has a password that you can not access. Extra miles on the vehicle. Hanging around with new friends. Suddenly having a new hobby. Hiding the phone bill, ripping it up before you can see it. Unexpected purchase of new cell phone or pager.

2. Stopped wearing wedding ring.
Saying I need my time, space, etc. Less attentive. He or she wants to know where you are all the time. Is he or she easily distracted, daydreams a lot? Is he or she spending less time with the family? Have you asked him or her, and he or she says “You are crazy, it is your imagination.”?

These are just some of the signs. There are more, but you will know.