After Divorce, Avoid Online Dating Faux Pas

    When Melissa McIntosh read the e-mail notifying her that she was no longer subscribed to a major online dating service, at first, she thought maybe there had been a mix-up with her credit card payment. Then, she read further. The reason she had been removed from the membership, the e-mail said, was she had “violated policies.”  

It took a call to customer service to find out the exact nature of her crime. A newbie to online dating, she had put her e-mail address in her profile thus revealing personal information too early in the game. If she had waited to give it out until, what this site calls “open communication,” that would have been OK. But, putting it out there right out of the gate was a no, no. The staff voted her off the island.  

This is not the kind of thing you let drop at cocktail parties, just standing there, martini in hand, casually mentioning that you got kicked off an online dating site. All the while, desperately hoping that someone else will say, “Yeah, that happened to me, too,” so you don’t have to feel like a total dweeb. To avoid having this happen to you, here are some tips for you.


SEVEN ONLINE DATING FAUX PAS TO AVOID

1. Not reading the fine print. 
Not putting personal info in your profile was in the 15 page Terms of Service document that hardly anyone clicks through to read. Reading it, rather than merely clicking the Accept box, would have saved Melissa’s membership.  

2. Being a cheater.
Shocking, but true, people lie about marital status when signing up. Even though the major dating sites ask you to be single and available before joining, they usually just take your word on this. But, don’t try that on True.com. True checks public records to make sure you’re telling the truth. If you’re not, True reserves the right to prosecute you for fraud. Sure, there are sites that openly advertise themselves as being hook up sites for married people looking for a fling. This means both parties who meet through the service are aware that there’s a whole lot of cheating going on. If that’s your thing, have the integrity to be honest about it with your spouse; have the respect to engage in this kind of behavior only with the agreement of your spouse; and have the smarts to use safe sex precautions so you don’t bring an STD home to an unsuspecting spouse. That said, representing yourself as available for relationships when you are committed (at least legally) comes under the category of promoting information you know is false and misleading. If you engage in these kinds of shenanigans, you could seriously hack off someone who has paid to be introduced to people who truly are available. If they report you to the dating service, don’t say we didn’t warn you.