After Divorce, Planning a Party

DIVORCE PARTY DOS AND DON’TS 

    Christine Gallagher has made a career out of planning divorce parties. She is the author of "The Divorce Party Planner," which has step-by-step guidance for throwing a divorce party. She also has a Web site called divorcepartyplanner.com that includes information about themes, gifts, guest list, invites, menu and drinks, entertainment, party games, music ideas, decorations, prizes and favors. Some hints from Gallagher about how to put together a divorce party:  

1. Do have a good friend host it for you or at least help you.  

2. Do consider the tone of the party. Some people like to laugh and have fun, others may want a quieter party. 

3. Choose a theme to pull it all together – it will help with the planning.  

4. Don’t invite minor children!  

5. Don’t be mean-spirited. Having a party to basically trash the ex is very negative and won't help at all in helping person get over the marriage.   

6. Do let some time pass between the breakup and the party. Having a party too soon can be a bad idea if person is emotionally raw. Often divorce parties occur when the divorce is final, as a wrapping up of a difficult prolonged phase.  

7. Don’t make it a surprise party. The person has to be in the right state of mind, otherwise it could be jarring and uncomfortable.  

8. Don’t let a toxic spouse throw a party. For example, a terminal philanderer should never thrown his or herself a party - if their bad behavior caused the marriage to end.  

9. Do consider a theme. A Survivor Party could be built around the television Survivor theme: he or she survived the sinking ship of marriage - desert island beach food. Choose music like "I Will Survive".  At a Lemon Party, everything is built around lemons – from food to gift ideas to decorations. Hang a “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade” banner.   

10. Do bring a gift. Or have a divorce shower replacing all items the ex too with him or her, or pool money together for a splurge gift like a trip.