Hi Yutie, I was told by a lawyer that there's no such thing as a "legal" separation. Maybe that's just in PA. I'm not sure. I have to be careful what I post on here b/c stbx's bitch hacked into my computer and was posting things with my screen name. She confessed to the police Sat. She is evil. Toxic.

I have a question: How are you with your in-laws? I have talked/emailed mine and they take my side b/c stbx is selfish with his crisis/affair. What happens when Christmas rolls around?

Yutie, I was reading your reply to the lawyer v/s mediator and you sound JUST LIKE ME. Married 25 yrs (Oct 1), separated but not "legally", stbx wants to be fair, is having the midlife crisis/affair, and doesn't want to spend $$ on lawyers. He initiated divorce too. He actually said he'd buy me a place and give me some $ per year. I have MS and I think he feels obligated. Which he damn sure should. That's why I need to find a caring lawyer who will fight for what I will need for my future. Is it possible to find a compassionate lawyer? I've seen two - a woman and a man. I liked them both. Think a woman would be more feeling. I was pretty set on the mediator route after what I've been hearing, but not so sure now.