I couldn't belive what you said about what your wife had done.Well I have been fighting with my husband about the same thing but he say he hasn't done any thing.I left him last week again we talked and he said that she was just a friend.He see her allmost every day and talks to her every day on his phone.He say he gets along with grils better.HA HA!! But I fond a address he had of one of her friends and seen he had wrote her.And by the way my husbands friend is married.That is way Iam writting you.Your story seems to be alot like what Iam going throw.But I am not getting any where with him about how I feel. I can't keep up with what he is doing his phone is throw work so I can't find out any thing there.And when he see her he is at work.So I realy don't know what to do.But the only thing I can't figer out wayhe didn't end it with me when I lelft him.We are back togather again but I can't that all this go.He said he has kept things from me.Then he said that I would get upset if he told me about the things he has not told me.Well I thought I would write you.Things are so upsetting to me.Keep writting ok.

I'll call you on your sh** if I see any. But I'll do it gently. And I hope you'd do the same for me. "Do everything in love."

I hope you don't mind me popping in my thoughts - I read what you wrote on Tracy's wall, and I'm not the least bit offended or angered, but I did want you to know that I have been cheated on, both emotionally and physically, and I have been the cheater. I do know the pain very well from cheating on all sides, including what cheating and divorce does to children, as I am a child of divorce. Yes, I am loose with my friends, but I also let them know directly that when I say, "I love you" it is nothing more than that I care about them and their well being and would consider them a brother or a sister to me. I have boundaries and make them clear. I know it is a fine line and a slippery slope, so I watch msyelf very carefully, and it is one of the reasons I am so open with my husband regarding my friendships with men. I have been hurt very deeply by the emotional games of others, as well as the cheating physically, so I don't go into this blindly. And to me, I can't tell which is a worse feeling of betrayal, an affair of ANY sort, or the abusive nature of some people that profess love. It's not something a lot of people can understand, but it's how I am, and how I know for a fact that if my husband had an affair, I would not be as hurt (nor would that be fair to be too hurt because I did the same thing to thim) or feel as much of a betrayal...more of a vindication that maybe he really didn't love me as much as he professed, especially when he didn't want to stop his abusive ways with me or our children. I respect your position and *still* can't understand why your wife is so offended of owning up to what she did.