I am witting now , mostly because I just want to know all the things that I have been doing up to now , is it out of love or out of hate.How it is possible after all the things happened between me and him, I still enjoy making love to him. I had the best valentine evening with him and our son. I could see how happy is our son. After 15 years of marriage , When I found out that he had mistress I was so mad that I broke all the bridges between us I taught there is nothing left between us, except our beautiful 11 years old son.It took 2 years to get divorce but even during our divorce process he always made me to make love to him, we really could not just finish forever. I know he is in part time relationship with the OW because they work together, and she will never stop, because she knows she can never find better than him, but I was hoping that and may be I am still hoping that one they they will stop this crazy , stupid relationship and he will come back to his family and be a full time father to his son. and this hope made me go against my moral values and again over and over sleep with him. I thought many times if it is a good idea that I tell the Ow that I am sleeping with him and sex is hundred times better than before, I have to be honest here that I really enjoy making love to him , because before our son was my priority and I could not have enough free time to enjoy my husband now our son is 11 years old and life is easier, but his father is not here, well I have to admit that his father was another child he needed constant attention, he was not helping me and he was a very demanding man.last saturday after we had dinner in his place my son was watching tv , he took me to his bedroom and made love to me. I just could not say no, and next day I saw his e mail that he received from theOw, she was saying that just telling her that he loves her it is not enough, and she wants more. In one hand I was happy that he spend the valetine evening with his family but in the other hand I hated myself for everything that I did and I keep doing that, I destroyed m

I am witting now , mostly because I just want to know all the things that I have been doing up to now , is it out of love or out of hate.How it is possible after all the things happened between me and him, I still enjoy making love to him. I had the best valentine evening with him and our son. I could see how happy is our son. After 15 years of marriage , When I found out that he had mistress I was so mad that I broke all the bridges between us I taught there is nothing left between us, except our beautiful 11 years old son.It took 2 years to get divorce but even during our divorce process he always made me to make love to him, we really could not just finish forever. I know he is in part time relationship with the OW because they work together, and she will never stop, because she knows she can never find better than him, but I was hoping that and may be I am still hoping that one they they will stop this crazy , stupid relationship and he will come back to his family and be a full time father to his son. and this hope made me go against my moral values and again over and over sleep with him. I thought many times if it is a good idea that I tell the Ow that I am sleeping with him and sex is hundred times better than before, I have to be honest here that I really enjoy making love to him , because before our son was my priority and I could not have enough free time to enjoy my husband now our son is 11 years old and life is easier, but his father is not here, well I have to admit that his father was another child he needed constant attention, he was not helping me and he was a very demanding man.last saturday after we had dinner in his place my son was watching tv , he took me to his bedroom and made love to me. I just could not say no, and next day I saw his e mail that he received from theOw, she was saying that just telling her that he loves her it is not enough, and she wants more. In one hand I was happy that he spend the valetine evening with his family but in the other hand I hated myself for everything that I did and I keep doing that, I destroyed m

why there is no punishment for those who does not respect their family and just destroy their family and leave their children and wife suffer. Five months after divorce still I could not understand why it happened and how he could choose other woman's happiness over his son's and wife's happiness. my son gets home 3 hours before me , and those 3 hours is very difficult for both of us I am always worried if he is ok and he is also sad because he is alone at home. I can not get baby sitter because I am trying very hard to pay for house and all the expences, the child support I am getting it does not pay even for the milk and bread, I had to get second mortgage to pay him and buy his share, because I did not want our son loses his friends and put him in new environment and I often get home with tears in my eyes, when I see our son is alone at home it just kills me , and I say to myself he has to be here with his son not with that woman. I wonder what is it that is more important than the love for our child.well he is not here , our home is quiet and every night every minute I miss my family and my son needs his family too. But it is too late.I always think if people could get punished for cheating on their wifes and husband, they will think twice about cheating. Poor the children that they suffer for the parents wrong doing. and I think it is time to put stop on these kind of behaviour . I like to start a movement and get people to understand what they are doing it is wrong, our society is sick, there is no respect for our children and family. I need help here please tell me if you could some how connect me to all those people has been in this kind of situation, and they want to join me . Thank you melina