Healy,this is my second in my life.It is only natural to feel this.It does abate after time.Ma'am after my first divorce,I had custody of our children.I threw myself into parenting.About 9 months after the divorce I had given up looking and that is when someone walked into my life and greatly enhanced it.All those feeling disappeared. Healy,I am in divorce for the second time,ma'am all those feelings have returned with a vengence.I feel so hurt vunerable and exposed.I realize they are my problems.I try not to easily but I try to suppress them because I must go through the grief and recovery phase before I could hope to establish a positive relationship.

thank you healy. it was my great grandmother that passed, but she lived a full life, was time for her to go. I really appreciate your kindness. *hugs*

No problem. I was pretty blunt and I didn't mean to be. I understand that it's hard. I read your story and your other blogs and I think I sort of get it now. My ex and I separated when our youngest daughter was only 5 weeks old. So it's sort of similar. It's very difficult and I totally relate with you wanting him and his GF to suffer--just think;she inherited a big mess, and I think in time she'll come to realize that she's made a very poor choice. Your ex, on the other hand, seems to think he's found greener pastures--the grass is rarely greener on the other side. And I truly believe that he'll answer for what he did to you and your kids. He may or may not be a great father--I don't know him. But it's starting to sound to me like he walked out on his family--and at a very bad time. He might've felt the marriage was ending; he might've felt that things were falling apart and he may have been very unhappy, but the proper thing to do is to work through it, not hop on the next-best thing. He did it all wrong, and instead of bowing out gracefully, he snuck around. Anyhow, keep in touch with us here at D360, we'll do our best to help you through it and I wish you peace.