My Story ::  ladyleo

How Did You Meet?

We worked together in the same organization     

Describe your marriage before the problem.

Companions, not soulmates but friends with common interests and goals. We frequently worked in the same organization or on similar projects.  After I retired from the military in 1998, I did not initially work in order to spend time with our children and to support my husband's career as he was moving into executive ranks.

Tell us how you first realized you had a problem.

I first discovered my husband was involved with three women in 2000 and we almost divorced.  At the time he insisted he did not want to divorce and wanted to work things out (he was still on active duty at the time).  We both made an effort to work through the issue and I thought it was behind us.  In the summer of 2008 I went to be with our daughter who is on active duty in the Air Force for the birth of her first child (and our first grandchild).  The baby was born with several problems and I was gone for 2 months.  When I returned (my husband and I talked on the phone every day), his personality had changed completely.  He was cold and uncommunicative, but kept insisting there was no problem.  Eventually I discovered he was involved with a young woman he has known for a couple of years.

What did you do about it or if you have not done anything yet, why?

In November he began to make comments that we had nothing in common, but would refused to elaborate -- usually made the comments as he was leaving the house.  After confirming -- from text messages on his phone, cell phone records (they were calling each other up to a dozen times a day!), and discovering he was using the woman's name as his password on email & computer accounts I decided to end our marriage.  The next day, he announced he intended to divorce me ... and I responded that I knew of his affair and the grounds for the divorce would be his adultery.

If you're not yet divorced, what is your greatest fear?

My biggest concern is financial.  

If you're not yet divorced, what two tips would you share with others?

If your divorce is final, what was the hardest part of the divorce?

If your divorce is final, what two tips would you share with others?