My Story ::  demoralized

How Did You Meet?

We met through a family member.

Describe your marriage before the problem.

I thought we had the typical marriage with its normal ups and downs.  We both worked at our jobs for over 25 years.  We raised two great boys who are in college. 

Tell us how you first realized you had a problem.

I had noticed that he became extremely critical of everything I did or said.  He would make fun of me in public and our families.  He was always picking an argument from me.  He knew I hated fighting over anything and I quickly became miserable.  I had looked to him for approval on everything and he was never home.  He was always playing ball or at work.  I never ever guessed that he was cheating on me with his secretary who was 15 years younger than him and had been my friend.

What did you do about it or if you have not done anything yet, why?

I am now divorced as of December.  We separated last February.  At first he moved out and I stayed in our home until I could get our youngest son in college.  Then I moved out of our home and into an apartment.  He promptly moved back into the house which is what he had wanted all along.  He told me he had planned our divorce for over a year.

If you're not yet divorced, what is your greatest fear?

If you're not yet divorced, what two tips would you share with others?

Please be aware of your spouse's finances and to look at every potential situation for the consequences.

If your divorce is final, what was the hardest part of the divorce?

Seeing 25 years of my life just dissolve because he was selfish and manipulative.  Seeing the heartbreak on my boys' faces when I told them.

If your divorce is final, what two tips would you share with others?

Please be totally aware of the family finances.  Marriage should be a partnership.