One lesson you must learn is: Don’t introduce your children to your new boyfriend too quickly. If your new boyfriend has children you may be tempted to bring your children together, especially if finding a sitter is a problem. The danger is that if you break up, your kids and his might become confused. They will still want to be friends, not understanding that their parents no longer date. Imagine making a new friend and not being able to play with that friend because your parents do not get along. That can be devastating to a child.

Another potential problem is the attachment your children might develop to your boyfriend. If things don’t work out, then the kids are left feeling abandoned by an adult they may have learned to love.

As you enter into other relationships, their confusion will be compounded. If they have a troubled relationship with their father and are now looking to your boyfriend as a father figure, a break up can be emotionally scarring. It might be best to wait before your new boyfriend meets your kids. That way you can slowly introduce him into their lives. Keeping your boyfriend distant from your children may be tough, but you must think of their feelings. Kids want mom and dad together. They are often traumatized by the divorce, and they may embrace or repel newcomers too quickly. Take it slow; it will save a lot of heartbreak.