My friend confronted me the other day about her situation, and she was just so confused.  She asked me " How do you know when it's time to leave?"  She thought since I had been through it, I would be able to help her.  Actually, no-one can tell you when it's the right time.  I knew that she really wanted me to give her an answer, perhaps to make her feel better about her decision.  To be honest, different people seem to hold on longer than others, and even though every situation may be similar, it still isn't the exact same situation. I tolerated my "now" ex because I wanted to hang on as long as I could because of our daughter. She was so young and innocent and I didn't want to take her father away from her. I was miserable and didn't know how I could have clung onto him as long as I did, but I had that last dying hope inside of me that maybe we would be able to find ourselves back to each other.  I struggled for months and months trying to rationalize what I was doing and why. To answer this question, I believe that you will know when it's time to leave when you feel like you have done everything that you could but it still wasn't working.  If your partner is not working with you, then it surely won't work, because it takes two for the partnership/marriage to work.  I felt as though all my hope was washed away after trying for so long that I just suddenly felt one day that it was the right time. Only you can make that decision, not your family, your co-workers or your friends.