My heart has almost complrtely healed
I have been away from the site for a while. Like many you I was devastated by the betrayal of my soon to be ex. But I have found a man who is very nice. He too is divorced. I have learned how to relieve the pain of my soon to be ex betrayal. I will not allow him to be the one to have all the fun. I was staying at home like a hermit for 8 months and he was out with his sweet young thing having a good time. I felt there must be something I did wrong, but that is not the truth. I am regaining my self worth. I am not the old ball and chain, something my soon to be ex felt I was, and told me I was
I have begun to go places and meet new people and I will not allow my soon to be ex to be the only one having a good time. The relationship is one of friendship, going out to dinner and movies. He expects no physical relationship as my divorce is not final and I can not create a situation to make my divorce complicated. He is all right with that. This man is a true gentleman. He treats me like the lady I am. He has shown me that there is nothing wrong with me and that my soon to be ex is the one with all the issues. My confidence is slowly returning. I am smiling and laughing again. I feel that my future is now bright and the pain my soon caused is becoming just a distant memory. I was alittle sad when I received separation and property settlement papers came on Friday. But it was only sad because Most endings are sad. But now I know there is a bright future out there waiting for me to grab and run with it. Two Months ago I thought my life was over, but now as I face a new beginning.I wonder if my soon to be did me a favor. Looking back wonder if the love I felt came from habit and fear of the unknown. But I have decided not to fear the unknown and embrace it as a new opportunity to find the thing I have never known. I have been married for 30 years, I married at 17. I realize that I have newer truly experienced alot of the wonderful thing there are in life. All I knew was my soon to be ex. But I have found that there are men out there who find me attractive,an somone who has a lot to give My soon to be ex was quick to criticize my looks and many other things to tried and make me feel bad about my self. I had become a withdrawn and timid woman. It took me a while to find the stron and confident woman that was hidder deep in side me. For the first time in 30 years I have gone on a date. We have been communicating for about a month. He thinks I an beautiful both inside and out. I still do not see remarriage in my future, But you never know what like what the future holds. But I am going to try and grab happiness with both hands.I can't say if I have found mr right But I have found mr right now, and we are both happy with that. But I am going to get back in the land of the living and LIVE.
