Made it Through Another Day
Well - I made it through another day without calling him. I have a new mantra - which is "I will not allow myself to be hurt." I have to face the fact that I was prolonging the pain by staying engaged with my stbxh. I wanted to keep him in my life so I was opening myself up to hurt over & over.
Yesterday really does feel like I hit the bottom and saw just how much I was allowing myself to get hurt. I also saw that I just do NOT have anything in reserve. I am spent - like Kramer said "Stick a fork in me - I'm done." I just cannot do it anymore. I have been so fractured by what has happened and my willingness to continue this crazy dance.
But - here it is midnight and I didn't crumble. I stayed strong and probably sang my mantra 1000 times. Hey - whatever works!
by
Mb
Posted on
5/8/2008 2:01 AM
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