Well I had a funny day at my office today and I thought I'd share...

A new client came into my office today, he was in need of an annulment of his marriage. When I asked him how long he was married he said, "a week, but technically only 4 hours."  The look on my face let him know he needed to explain that one...he asked if I had a DVD player, and we sat down to watch his wedding video - he fast forwarded through the ceremony...

He was on the dance floor with his new sister in law at his reception. They were laughing, enjoying the dance, when all of a sudden like some rabid bat out of hell his new wife comes charging onto the floor, grabbing her sister by her extensions, whipped her around and just was pounding the crap out of her face. There was blood on the wedding dress, on the floor, all over her sister's face & dress...it was a mess.

When he (my now client) went to stop his new wife from killing her sister, she stood up and slammed her knee full force right into my client's "frank n beans". He went down screaming...

The wife was yelling something about cheating bastard, whore, stuff I won't type here...at the two of them.

He shut off the DVD and filled me in on the rest...

Apparently, someone at the wedding had heard from someone else who had heard from someone else, etc (you know how that goes) that her new husband, and her sister, were having an affair. She looked at his cell phone and sure enough, there were calls back and forth between the two of them, even two calls the day before the wedding, and one text saying "I'll meet you there". Evidence enough, right? 

The police were called, she went to jail on drunk in public, resisting arrest and domestic violence, and my client and the sister went to the hospital. The sister had her nose re-set and he had to have surgery because she slammed him so hard one of his testicles burst.

The wife got out of jail, and was promptly told by her father what a huge mistake she had just made.

The sister is a real estate agent, the husband, as a wedding gift to his new wife, bought her old family home that she had grown up in as a child and was devastated when her parents had moved out of it. He paid a premium price for it too because it wasn't actually on the market, he talked the owners into selling. The plan was that he was going to surprise her with it when they got home from the honeymoon and while they were gone, the sister was going to have it fully furnished and decorated.

Since he bought the house before they were legally married, it is 100% his property, and he has vowed to never sell it just to make sure she never gets the chance to ever live there again.

He will get his annulment.

Comments for "I now pronounce you husband & pugilist - you may get your annulment now"  (4) (You must be logged in to answer)

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