Hmm, 5 years and this is how it ends.  I am really just releaved that he has told me the truth about his feelings for me.  He will keep putting those kind of decisions off for a very long time.  But, that is another story.  Going through mediation was fine.  I don't despise me ex and I actually think he is a really nice person at times.  We both equally decided to end the marriage, and we didn't have any issues of adultery or anything.  We just knew we had to end it.  I don't think he knew what divorce means as far as going through the assets and alimony and child support.  He thought that he would just pay for our child and that would be that.  I have been a stay at home mom this whole time.  I never wanted to take him to "the cleaners" or anything, but he has a real distorted view of reality.  I think that if anybody else would tell him some of their stories he would maybe get a different view.  But, when you are going through this process, it can be quite lonely.  I think that what I am asking is reasonable, and that is why we went to a mediator, and he agreed at first until he saw how much he would be living on.  My heart went out to the dude for a minute, but, I am taking care of our child about 93% of the time.  He has that inability to see past himself at times.  But, I didnt' really expect for him to realize how much it takes to not just raise a child financially but also to take care of her growth and well-being.  And it has really been laid on me to do all that with her, I am a stay at home mom, but I don't know how much I also sacrificed to raise her.  And he has been able to do just about anything he wants.  He travels when he wants, goes out when he wants, he wanted to quit his job and start a business and I totally supported him in all of that.  I always wanted him to make himself happy and better himself as he saw fit.  And I think that even though he will have to pay some alimony for less than 2 years, I have decided that we could re-negotiate every 6 months, then why can't he take a brake from doing a lot of those extras that he indulges in so that I can reestablish myself and try to make a nice home for our daughter.  Just give me some time and support, I have been out of the game for 5 years.  That is the latest thing that has happened since out divorce started a month ago.  I am not really shocked by his actions, I am just hurt that he would think that me and our child would ever be living even close to how will end up living.  I hope he can see that I am not trying to hurt him or break him.  We made a pact when my daughter was born that I would stay at home and I could work small part time jobs as I saw fit and that fit into the schedule of the household.  I did what I could.  And I never asked for much.  We are both pretty simple when it comes to material things.  And all big purchases were for his pleasure not mine.  I can't believe he thinks that he will ever live in sqwualer because of this.  Nobody wins in divorce and nothing absolutely nothing is fair.  Even when you go to a mediator.