How Does A Single Mother Do It All And Have A Sex Life?
Sex is a very big part of my life, it always has been. I can be happy without it, but not for long.
Some women see the end of a marriage (that involves children), as the end if their sex life. They think no one will want them because NOW they have kids. This is not true, however, the younger the child…the more creative you need to become.
When I left my husband, Steven and Brad were 1 & 4. Even though I left him, I continued to sleep with him on the side because it was easy. I didn’t have to worry about babysitters, I knew my kids were safe, and they didn’t think twice when Daddy came to their new house and stayed the night. In hind site, I guess it was more of a closure thing than anything but I’m not sure it was the right thing.
I dated for about 7 months off and on…it was more off than on because I needed to find a babysitter first and my mother was never quick to offer. I believe you have to set boundaries.
I think bringing a man to your home after just meeting him is wrong. First of all, you don’t know him, second of all, what if he ends up being a whack job?? Then you’ve put you and your kids in danger.
When I met Richard, my bf of 8 years, it was 3 months before I brought him home and even long before he met my kids. He would come over when they were in bed. I’m not advertising for premarital sex, in the eyes of many its wrong…but I never claimed to be a saint.
We, as women, have needs and just because you’re a single mother doesn’t mean you have to be celibate until you find a potential husband. We’ve come a long way and its OK to take a test drive before you buy anything.
My suggestion to you is, keep your single/available woman life separate from your single Mommy life. The chances of you finding Mr. Right the first time around after a failed marriage aren’t very good and you don’t want your kids to get attached to people that wont be in their life 3 months from now. Kids have enough to deal with, they don’t need the added confusion.
Even though my oldest is in the Navy now and my youngest is 16, I STILL have respect for them when it comes to having men stay the night. After living with their single mother all their lives, they understand the drill now. Mom will tell them about the new man in her life when there is something to tell!!!
by
Lori-Woodall
589 Posts
Posted on
10/26/2007 6:27 PM
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