I am confused 

I agree with DBD. I don't really have much to add beyond that.  You need to look out for yourself otherwise this will tear you apart.  Another good person to talk to on this is Wow9cats.  She's been through a similar event recently.  I think you two could relate.

Sometimes they come back, sometimes they dont. No one can tell. What I would suggest is dont sit around and dwell  "will he or wont he??...." take it from me, it'll KILL you and really prohibit you from moving on. I have spent countless days and nights crying, to this day. But I am learning... Try to focus on yourself, and do what you can to become stronger and heal from this pain, which you will need to do, whether he comes home or not. Like they say, expect the worst, but hope for the best. If you think things are really still very unsure, dont make any bold permanent decisions, but do everything in your power to make sure you are taking care of YOU, emotionally, financially, and otherwise. If he does say he wants to come home, really evaluate how it would make YOU feel... What if he changes his mind and wants to leave again, could you go through it again? I would make sure he is committed to it a million percent, WANTS it, not just think its the easy, practical choice. There was something wrong that made him leave in the first place, so make sure those issues are brought to surface and addressed. Good luck to you... remember we are here for you, and I am in your same boat! its nice to know you're not alone!

I completely understand your confusion.  I found out 7 weeks ago that my stbx had been cheating on me.  He is now trying to keep me in limbo, saying things like he misses his family and loves me, but just isn't quite ready to come home yet.  What the F is that supposed to mean?   In other words, he expects me to wait and see what he decides after being single a while finishing his mid-life crisis.  I really had wanted to try to work it out, but I don't want someone that 'needs time' to figure it out.  What you should do is make a list of things you love about him and things you hate about him.  I did this, and boy was the hate list long.  What I loved about him was the companionship and family unit, what I hated was the betrayal, lies, deception, double-life behind my back, sleeping with me  after boinking skanks, etc.  You will see that even though you miss and love the life you once had, he is not the man you thought you knew and loved.  At some point, aliens invaded and took over.  I now see that even though I still cry alot over what has happened to me, I have to let him go completely.  Let's face, once they made the decision to cheat they let go of the marriage themselves.  I have decided that I want someone that respects and honors the committment of marriage, and won't settle for my stbx when he finally realizes what his life is going to be without his family.  He now rents a room from an old man, pays child support, and has no money left over for much of anything.  Not very much to show for a man his age....the skanks certainly won't want his sorry but for long.