In the Middle Of Divorce And Lost 

My husband left the family in january and took 8 months to pay for his lawyer, i recently received the papers.  The problem is i dont have money for a lawyer of my own and i know i could get alot more child support, 401k split, other stocks and assets. We had no home of our own and he gets to keep the new car, the one with aircondition.  Anyway we get along great, lately, it almost seems like he doesnt want to go thru with the divorce but has not actually said it.  He knows i dont want a divorce but i find myself with no choice but to move on.  I need a lawyer but im afraid he will get angry when he finds out i had been planning to try to get more from him so the kids and i could live a little bit better.  When we are not getting along he doesnt treat the kids very well, not abusive just short and sometimes wont bother to make the visits, so for their sake i have learned to swallow my pride.  So now i dont know what to do,,the ball is basically in my court, he has told me to take my time getting the papers signed and back to him. Im afraid if i do it to quickly he will think im in a hurry, one lawyer advised me not to sign, to retain her and she will give his lawyer the answer.  He is expecting the papers signed and notorized, i dont want to ruin the relationship we seem to be building and im afraid to lose him completely because i know my kids will too.  What advice can u all give me.