So I had to get my daughter a new passport for her trip to London with the school band. And because she is under 16, they require both parents there or demonstration of why the other parent doesn't need to be there. I don't remember it being any problem the last time, but this time I had to pull out the final ruling giving me full legal custody. And that page alone wasn't satisfying, she wanted copies of multiple pages, I think mostly because the same page that had the custody ruling also had information about his infidelity and she seemed interested in reading more about it.
There were a few other parents there from the school getting passports for their kids. And as I had to go through the whole thing with the woman at the post office in charge of passports, raising her eyebrows as she read through my divorce papers, for the first time in a while, I felt humiliated by it; by being divorced, by the circumstances of my divorce, by the fact that I married a completely idiot.
I had a phone conversation the other night with a guy, a widower. Married 26 years, and was totally in love with his wife. He was asking me about my relationship history and it sounded so pathetic. A few years with this one, a few years with that one. And it's not like I didn't (don't) want to be in one relationship for the rest of my life. I thought that is what I had in this last relationship.
Honestly, I just want to get it right already!