- And is it even that black and white?
While I was hanging out over at Helium.com, looking for debates so I can fulfill my daily requirement of arguing, I came across an interesting debate that I thought was worded a bit unfairly. Are affairs a 'forgivable sin'? But what was even more startling than the wording were the results of the poll. Over 2000 people participated in the poll (the results of which can be seen here: http://www.helium.com/debates/68500-adultery-affairs-are-a-forgivable-sin/side_by_side) and 46% said marital affairs are unforgivable, while 54% said they were forgivable. No other choices were offered. I couldn't help but wonder: could this issue be that black and white?
I don't think so. My first gripe is that deducing infidelity down to that of a "sin" invokes religion where religion need not be invoked. My second gripe is that A LOT of factors need to be considered before you can even consider forgiving a cheating spouse.
- How long has it been going on? (a one-night stand? an ongoing affair?)
- With whom? (someone you know?? Your cousin, sister, best friend, a stranger?)
- How did you find out? (did they confess? did you find them in your bed?)
- How are they handling it now? (are they sorry? are they making excuses?)
And the list goes on. This question cannot be whittled down to a mere yes or no. And I am SHOCKED that only 46% - a minority - said that infidelity was unforgivable. I would have placed the odds somewhere at around 70/30. (With the 70 being for the UNforgivable). Boy, was I wrong. And 2000 people is a lot of people. It's not like it was only 100 people. That means that there are a lot of very forgiving people out there.
I'm not one of them.
What do you guys think? Can you boil down an extramarital affair into such a black-and-white debate? Which camp would you be in? (And is it a sin? Though maybe that's a debate for a different blog entry...)