In the past 2 days, 2 people I know have told me that they are ready to file for divorce. Both have talked to lawyers. Both are women that are the main financial support for their husbands. And both said the same thing to me - "I hope I have the strength not to go back."
It isn't about security for these women, both will potentially be better off financially if they leave. It is about change. One has been unhappy for 15 years, married to a man that is selfish and manipulative. The other for 25 years with a man that is barely there and is unfaithful. Yet both are afraid that they won't have the strength to make this change. That they have become to enmeshed, even if it's not in a good way.
I would never tell someone to stay or leave, but I said the same thing to both of these women - choose happiness. Whatever you decide, choose happiness. You might not have it right away, but choose the option that has the potential to bring you happiness in the future.