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The Un-Family Vacation 

Just came back from vacation.

 

I went away with the kids. 2 weeks just us and then 1 week my b/f joined us. We had a fantastic time.  I needed to get away from the daily routine and the kids really enjoyed going to the beach. My b/f ended up going without his kids because he and his ex-wife couldn't come to terms on the kids traveling with us. It was a shame because I think all of them would have had a good time.

 

Their relationship needs a total make-over. Maybe that will be the next reality show. How to get exes to build a better relationship. I have never heard two people scream at one another so much. I love my boyfriend and I think he's a great guy and I wish he would try harder to not let his temper get the best of him. I have heard her on the phone with him. She is no easy pill to swallow either. Then again, separately, they are both terrific parents.

 

The time we spent together with my kids was spent having fun. It wasn't a romantic getaway; it was a family vacation. That's not what the Mrs. Boyfriend's Ex understood or wanted to understand. She claimed he would be too busy with me to pay attention to this children.  I am a mother, I understand her worries and concerns. However, I feel for him too because he is their father and he would very much like to spend vacation time with his kids and me.

 

Is anyone else out there having the same problem? How do you deal with family vacations? Does it matter that we're not married? Would it make a difference?  Is it possible that this divorce stuff is going to haunt all of us for the rest of our lives?

 

 

 

 

 

 

by SuYin  350 Posts 

Posted on 7/28/2008 2:39 PM
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Tags: mixed families , vacation , ex-spouses
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Comments for "The Un-Family Vacation"  (2) (You must be logged in to answer)




SuYin...I have the same horror going on. Be thankful that you are at least ALLOWED to be around his kids. I can't see them at all.
My bf & his ex don't talk a whole lot. Their conversations are him listening and her talking. Occasionally they have a screaming match.
We wanted to take his kids with us last week. But with the court ruling that no changes be made etc we were not able to. I can only imagine. You like me only want them to be included with your family. Not to take "her " place. She is insecure...like my bf's ex and can't stand the thought of it. I don't think marriafge will change anything. She will still be the bull dog mom who is threatened by the "new woman". Possibly, if we handle things right then maybe things will get easier...Lets hope so. Honestly,,with the way things are with my bf's ex ..I am ready to end the relationship. It is not even so much what she is doing but what he allows her to do.
by mtnvly   2418 Posts
Posted on 7/29/2008 1:51 PM
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Uhm...
No...
 I don't...
I doubt it, ask your b/f's ex, she's the one creating the distinction...
probably not...
quite possibly...

Ok, I'm done with the written test part.  here's the real reason I'm here:  WELCOME BACK SuYin!  It's been a while, I wondered if you'd sailed off the end of the flat earth! 

Ok, enough about me, back to me.  I'm not a dad, so I can't really answer your questions with any accuracy.  I will say that so long as your b/f and his ex don't make nice, you will always have these problems.  Whether it's family vacations, or what movie the kids are allowed to watch, there'll always be something.  I understand that they're good parents, and they care.  I know how even good people can go awry when mixed together.  Look what happens when you invite ammonia and bleach to the same party.  Seperate they're great cleaning agents, together: deadly.  Time doesn't change that.  THe only thing that will work is that you change the composition of the relationship.  That won't happen unless they're both willing to change.

Still, it sounds like you had a great 2 weeks!  Good for you!
by Robert-Boyd   3918 Posts
Posted on 7/28/2008 2:48 PM
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