“Have we completely given up on our eyebrows?” asked my stylist during my last appointment. When she worked in a fully service salon, she handled most of my grooming needs above the neck: haircuts, color treatments and waxing. Every four weeks, I was in her chair for two hours of primping and polishing. When she left the salon in favor of in-home services, certain offerings had to be eliminated: esthetician procedures being chief among them.
As I thought about her question, I realized that I haven’t been waxed all year.
Before I moved to my present location, I had all my waxing services done at a day spa near my office. When I first moved, I still made the trek nearly 100 miles back to that day spa – but with gas prices on the rise, they ceased being feasible early on.
So I was off to find a local esthetician. I tried one – experimenting just with my brows – in February. The experience was not a pleasant one, requiring me to hold off on any grooming for three months while my eyebrows grew back in enough to have them reshaped.
They are definitely back to their au natural form – and I know it’s not the most attractive of looks even if my glasses do help conceal the full force of them. Yet I still haven’t gotten around to getting them done.
As I discussed the difficulty of finding someone skilled and reliable to handle my beauty services, my stylist called me on the smokescreen.
“You’ve started getting your nails done so I know it’s not a financial problem.”
She’s right; it’s not. The funniest thing is that I am actually quite frumpy right now. Yes, I get my hair and nails done, and I am rarely without a full face of makeup. But I don’t pay nearly as close attention to the details as I used to. There was a time – and it wasn’t so long ago – that I had some sort of pampering done on a weekly basis. Some of that had to be set aside for financial reasons after Mr. Ex and I split. But there’s no reason now not to add it back in. Except that I don’t have to.
As my stylist and I talked, I realized that Drama Geek has given me a sort of comfort that’s new and refreshing. I was always the picture of perfect grooming with Mr. Ex because I felt I had to be in order to be “enough” for him. That was my constant challenge; nothing I ever did was enough to make him faithful to me. But the least I could do is make sure I looked better than his flings – and that’s something I always accomplished.
Now that I’m with Drama Geek, I’m secure in our relationship. I don’t feel the need to prove myself any longer. So that means I am the frumpiest I have ever been. This information worried my stylist; like me, she’s seen too many women get too comfortable in a relationship and stop making an effort toward their appearance. I don’t feel that’s the case with me, though. What I feel is that I’m continuing the process of getting comfortable in my own secure and feeling secure in a romantic relationship. And right now, that means shifting my focus away from aesthetic details. That focus will come back – and soon (because a girl can only so long without a Brazilian) – but it’s a nice place to be right now.