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Back Tracking

I have tried to listen to my heart. I am so confused (long time). My husband and I have had better communication. I know he knows I am planning on leaving and the day is getting close. Earlier this week while we were talking I advised I still could not get past the hurt. We agreed we needed to move on. That night he could not sleep, 3am he wakes me up to tell me he loves me and does not want to lose me. These past two days he seems so sincere. I know we love each other deeply. I am so torn, I know I will never love this way again but I also don't know if I can ever get past what he has done to our relationship. He still states there was no sex between the two of them, you would have to know him but he swore on his mothers life. Still he cheated. He called me twice at work today to tell me he was thinking of me and he loves me. It makes me want to cry because it makes me second guess myself about my decision. What to do???

by smalltowngirl 18 Posts

Posted on 7/23/2008 3:00 PM

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Comments for "Back Tracking" (5) (You must be logged in to answer)

Have you considered counseling? For the love you feel and the hurt you are also feeling look deep and see if what was there could help. Trust is a bitch to rebuild what does your heart say and what does your brain say? It is not easy and some times old wounds have to be re opened to be flushed out. Is he worth it to you? If he is.... go for it. You are not a fool. You are a woman who loves her husband enough to forgive him for a wrong that hurt you. That shows you are a good wife. And the fact you are struggling with these emotions show you are a loving wife. If he is being sincere....maybe he sees how bad he screwed up. You do whats best for you and no one will look at you as weak if you decide to forgive and try to forget. ***HUGGS*** you take care and I am thinking of you. Wishing you happiness

by Branny 743 Posts
Posted on 7/23/2008 4:22 PM

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That depends on who you ask. Although I will say, staying just to keep from being lonely is no reason to stay. It's as bad as all the selfish reasons for leaving.

No, it comes down to what's in your heart. It's obvious you've thought about this a lot, and you've weighed both sides. I think you're coming closer to making the move (one way or the other) for yourself.

I only offer all alternatives, because I'd hate to see you make a mistake. Whatever you choose, I think that you should have looked at every option.

In the end, it's up to you, and I wish you the best. Of course we're here for you, no matter what.

by Robert-Boyd 3880 Posts
Posted on 7/23/2008 4:19 PM

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You're dead on with the anger and pride. I feel as if i'm letting him get away with what he has done. I want to be financially free of all assets, so I will not be in this situation. I am thinking I am getting myself into a place where if I'm ready to leave I just walk. In doing so I am losing all we have worked for. Goes back to my thought of I could not just walk out on 23 years of stuff. I needed to get organized. Now I know I'm plotting and when house sells (if together) we'll be paying rent, no equity, nothing of value to worry about leaving. Sounds like a miserable life...love and nothing or build a new life for myself. I have made so many decisions to change things that I would have never done if I had not been put in this situation. Part of me says you started it now finish it. Just confused....what about only being responsible for me...would that be great or lonely?

by smalltowngirl 18 Posts
Posted on 7/23/2008 4:00 PM