I’m planning a wedding next month – not mine. This one is
for the one of the last of my college friends to get married. I was among the
first. Ever the trendsetter, I will likely be the first to remarry as well.
There’s something about weddings that makes the female brain
go haywire. A perfectly happy single woman will start second-guessing herself
and her life choices, in addition to her bra size and figure – all in an effort
to figure out why she’s not the lucky one to glide down the aisle in white
gossamer.
I count myself lucky to not be among that lot. I went to my
first wedding since decoupling with Mr. Ex early this spring. I almost ditched
the wedding for fear of being like the woman I just described. Instead, I
sucked it up and figured a dose of beach air was just what I needed. Even if I
chickened out of going to the wedding itself, I figured being in its vicinity
would be a nice change of pace.
As I drove to the coast, I thought of the bride and of the
groom. I thought of all the stress the bride was under: Her parents didn’t
approve of the groom and, therefore, were not as financially supportive of the
nuptials as she expected. Planning a honeymoon conception, she had gone off the
Pill as soon as they set a date. She didn’t expect to conceive the next cycle,
nor feel obligated to move up the wedding six months so she didn’t waddle down
the aisle like an Oompa Loopma.
All in all, I didn’t feel like I was missing out at all.
Now, as I prepare to send yet another single friend into the
married world, I am faced with more introspection. This bride and groom are
older. They’ve waited a long time for one another. Long enough to save up for
the big day and to do it in a way that’s true to their hearts and no one else’s.
I love this bride –
and not just because she’s highly suggestible and far from Brideszilla. I love
her because she’s real. She knows that the wedding day is meant to be the
beginning of something great, not something great of itself. She’s planning a
fabulous dinner party for 50 friends and family members, but she’s not so
caught up in the big day that she’s lost sight of what will come afterward. She’s
looking to kick off a great marriage – and she’s got her head in the right
place for it.
I’m really happy for her.