Search our site
divorce360.com provides help, advice and community for people
contemplating, going through or recovering from divorce and the issues around it,
including separation, divorce laws, spousal support and emotional issues.

profile
Community  :: sixara's Stuff  :: sixara's Blog

  click here 
Personal Tags
ADVERTISING PARTNERS


Blogs
You can search for Blogs by tag here:


Invite Others
Invite friends and family to join you on d360! - Click here

Feel so numb today... 

She is acting so much like oh life will be oh so wonderful for both of us after the divorce. I am just numb. I can;t stop randomly crying like a child these last 2 days. My day today is a little better but not much. I do not even trust my moods anymore as this has been the most screwed up event to ever happen to me. It was a bad year all the way around. It feels lonely, isolated, it sucks! Most of my friends are all married happily ever after and one just did get married after divorcing several years before from his then wife. I do not know what to say for myself. You look in the world and it trys so hard to say hey "everyone is happy" "everyone has it all together".. But as much as I wish that the case for a lot of us it is not at times.

 

Is it natural for me to blame myself for everything even though it was not all my fault?

 

I want her happy. I want my stepson happy. I suspect now to there might be someone else she is hiding from me. I am to much into denial to even go there. I told her if there ever was "I do not want to know about" and I told her I would do the same if I met someone in the future. You gents and ladies who have been cheated on I am so sorry. I know that pain has to be unbearable.

 

It has been very hard to hold my career together over this. I get tired of faking. It has seemed so easy to just go to a bar and drink myself into oblivion. I do not and will not do that. But God it is tempting. Everything seems so up in the air right now. It really sucks! All of it does.

 

Does this grief last forever? Does it ever go away? Anyone here who has been through worse and met someone better? That made them feel whole again? You know the " I am glad I divorced or I would have never met he/she types?" If so please share.

 

Thank You

by sixara  52 Posts 

Posted on 7/17/2008 8:38 AM
Get AlertsGet Alerts!
Sent to Friendsend to friend
0

Tags: reflection , life , memories , letting go ,
crying , sad , grief , divorce ,
blaming myself ,
<< Previous Post  |  Blog posts by sixara  |  Next Post >>


Comments for "Feel so numb today..."  (3) (You must be logged in to answer)




Quote "Is it natural for me to blame myself for everything even though it was not all my fault?
I don't know if its natural, but it sure seems common. I did/am doing the same thing. Even though now I realize it takes two to make it work, I know my faults were greater than hers in both number of occurances and importance. I would take her back in a second even if she were not to change at all. The whole pyschology of it is what confuses me the most.
Am I being too hard on myself? Was she at fault as well as I was? Or were her faults just her reactions to my faults?
Could I easily over look any issues on her end becasue now I am viewing life with a clearer head and open mind? Definitly.
I too want her to be happy, and I've had the thoughts that she has met someone else, it would explain a lot. But those thoughts really break me up, and similar to you, if she has met someone else, I certaily pushed her in that direction. Now I push those ideas out of my head. It's getting easier to do that.
I know I was at a point just three weeks ago where I was on the verge of becoming an alcoholic. i would come home at night, go sit on the porch and just drink beer and smoke cigs. oh, and cry. But i did realize I was headed for that additional problem and I rescued myself. But after many years of looking down on people who suffered from alcoholism, I can now fuloly understand how easily one can fall into that. It is so easy to want to drink the pain away, and cloud your mind from the memories.
I've avoided that hole. You will too!
by JerryF   16 Posts
Posted on 7/17/2008 9:42 AM
0





I have to believe there is someone better for us out there.  I am not going through divorce but I am in limbo.  I wish I could move on because this not knowing is killing me. I often wonder if my "soulmate" is out there.  I do not think my husband is my soulmate but I do love him.  I am not ready to give up.  However,  I am sure there must be someone who is exactly like me out there as there is someone out there for you.  Don't give up on love!  This has happened for a reason.  You have a lot of love to give.  You are a good person.  Heal first, then look for that perfect someone for you.