Well, I guess my marriage is HUMPTY DUMPTY. Sat on a wall and took a great fall. We tried to put it back together again must have used trick glue bacause the joke is on me.
I didn't think he would have done this in the first place. What the hell was I thinking when he wanted to come back and he loved me and thought it was worth making work? I was thinking with my heart, and not my head. The funny thing is, he thinks I DON'T have a heart. Maybe I don't, I gave it to him and he don't take very good care of it. I got the tear stains to prove it. He finally annswered a text said ........ "$50 for window, Kids can walk to store and as 4 us..........I just don't know right now" This is a man that said he loved me and made the biggest mistake of his life leaving. Said he would walk away from all that would not accept me as his wife. Said I made him happier than anything in this life. He held me when I cried and was scared and made love to me every night before we went to sleep. Kissed me good bye every morning even though I was still asleep and woke me with a smile in doing so. Mon & Tues was rough at work but he still intereacted but he was stressed. weds, he came to a dead stop and said nothing was bothering him untill last night. I forced the issue, I was serious on us dealing with it all. TOGETHER. But nothing can be fixed if no one knows it is broken. It seemed so petty and we talked about it but he remained distant and steadfast in his thoughts of me.
I guess he should get an academy award for the last few weeks. I know it wasn't all lies but I don't know the truth no more. How can I fight and he gives up. My fears were hurting me, all he had to do was stand there & hold my hand. It was subsiding from daily to maybe 1 or 2 times a week. Trust was being built up and there was alot of talking about EVERYTHING . Out of all the emotions shared this last week, love was the most shown as well as commitment and happiness then weds hit and nothing. There is still love but we are back to confusion, advoidance and hurt. Maybe this is all he is capable of. I don't know but I am ashamed of myself for putting myself & my children through this. He even wore me down to get out lives togethr again. Joint bank accounts and everything he ordered new checks with BOTH our names on them and was giddy while placing the order. Even spring for the little address labels with MR & MRS. on them. Maybe myheart is HUMPTY DUMPTY and His heart is behind the WALL.