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  Posted to group - What do i do now    <<Previous    Next>>

Hello, and sorry for the long post....

My divorce was finalized, and signed by the judge on the 12th of June, 2008. I was supposed to pick up 7 items from my ex, yesterday at 1:00. She did not give 2 of the items, and after great amounts of verbal abuse by her and her boyfriend (who is half her age) The police told me they cannot help since it is a "civil" matter. I find the lack of enforcement of civil law to be disgusting.

Any thought, or advise?

Bruce


Bruce

by bruce_banner    4 Posts   
Posted on 6/23/2008 3:54 PM    
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Answers for "Hello, and sorry for the long post...."  (10) (You must be logged in to answer)




1. what two things out of the seven did she not give you

2. When you spoke to the police, did they come to her home, or did you call them after the fact?

3. If she has an offshore account you need to contact the IRS - the courts here can't do anything about that money because it is out of their control - but her account could be considered illegal by the IRS depending on what she uses it for and if the money in it is not declared. You won't get your money, but you will get some justice getting her in hot water with the IRS.
 
As far as your things, if you want to contiue to fight this, her physical address hasn't changed, you write her a letter send it certified, return receipt requested, stating that she needs to return your items to you as ordered (attach a copy of the page of your order that says such, highlighted) and give her 15 days from receipt of the letter to make the arrangements. If she does not comply, you take her in for contempt...she will either not pick up or sign for the letter, or will disregard it - so you know you will end up in court.

Something you have to keep in mind - stuff is just stuff - it is replaceable - you can even, in time, replace it with better "stuff" - things that don't have any emotional attachment to her. You get those two items back, all they are going to do is remind you of what she put you through to get them...are they really that important?

by spaznskitz   2500 Posts
Posted on 7/7/2008 10:35 PM
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I would think she has to give it to you. Maybe you will have to get another order from the court and take someone with you to do it.
I , like Julie, would have to ask my self if the other things are worth what you will endure to get them.
by mtnvly   786 Posts
Posted on 7/6/2008 4:00 PM
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Bruce:   I don't have any legal advice to offer you, but I have a few questions for you:   How much energy and time and money have you already put into getting the money for your piano back? How much more energy and time and money will you have to invest to continue the fight? And finally, how much energy, time, and money would you need to invest into getting a new piano?   Obviously, it is going to be a pain in the ass to get a piano - whether it's getting the money for the one she sold or if it's finding a way to get a new instrument. My ex took my car right out of the driveway. He didn't want or need my car; he wanted and needed to remain engaged in a relationship with me. He got his kicks out of controlling me and he had to find a way to continue that, whether we stayed married or not. I knew it wasn't really my car that he wanted to possess; it was my freedom. But he couldn't take my freedom. I let him have the car, and life provided me with a new one. Not as nice, but it was mine. It was pure.     The piano is nothing without the passion you feel for it. But THAT piano is not the object of your passion. THAT piano is only the object of your struggle with her. You are in a tug of war over this: What would happen if you detached yourself emotionally from the piano, and just let go of your end of the rope? Could you put all of that time, energy, and money into coming up with a plan to acquire a new piano? Maybe it won't be as nice a piano - but then again, maybe it will be; you'd be surprised at how much power there is in letting go... it can make miracles happen. One more question: What would you rather invest yourself in?: Fighting against her, or working FOR yourself?   Peace and strength, Julie
http://www.TakingTheStairs.com
by JulieMcKown   9 Posts
Posted on 6/25/2008 5:27 PM
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Some people are just vicious . This person wants to see you suffer. I wanted out so I only took very little except I do have my freedom. I had to leave all it behind. I know it is hard. I basically had to beg, burrow and buy real cheap.
by shock3177   216 Posts
Posted on 6/24/2008 2:24 PM
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