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  Posted to group - What do i do now    <<Previous    Next>>

Is husband up to something?

To make a long story short, husband announced in Feb. that he thinks he would be happier living on his own....not willing to see marriage counselor, not willing to compromise in any way, been married 27 years and now we are looking at separating come Aug. when daughter leaves for college. He knows and says he agrees to splitting our assets 50/50 and I have been a stay at home mom for the last 5 years which means he is also looking at paying alimony. He came home today and announced he is planning to start a remodeling business and asked me to work for him since he knows I am need of a job in the near future. When I pressed him further about this 'so-called job' he got somewhat frustrated and said he hadn't thought it all yet (no surprise there) but because I have real estate and homebuilding exp) I would be the first person he would consider hiring. I cannot help but wonder if he has talked with someone that is telling him to try and get ME to work for HIM so that will help him in our situation and hurt me in some way. Am I paranoid or what? Personally....since he iniated this future separation I would really rather just settle with the division of our assets and take my time finding a job that I might really enjoy. Why would he think I would want to work for him and deal with on a daily basis after he has announced he doesn't want to stay married to me? Is this just weird or what or is he up to something?

by Confused7   4 Posts 
Posted on 5/27/2008 9:51 PM
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Answers for "Is husband up to something?"  (5) (You must be logged in to answer)




Go girl....
by mtnvly   2418 Posts
Posted on 5/28/2008 10:40 AM
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Thanks for everyones input and I too think it would be a bad idea to work for him and feel the ONLY reason he is throwing this idea out there is for selfish reasons. First of all, he has been talking about doing this remodeling business for several years now and I have yet to see a glimpse of anything in the works...why now? He knows (because we have talked about several times) that he is going to have to pay me alimony since I have been a stay at home mom for a few years now and it is going to take me awhile to get back into the job market, so there is another red flag. In my opinion I think he sat down in his huge leather chair at his plush little office and did the math and realized, OMG....alimony AND half of all of our assets and not a happy man is he.
by Confused7   4 Posts
Posted on 5/28/2008 7:53 AM
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Can't understand why he would do that unless he is up to something. I wouldn't work for him . I would do my own thing. If you are separated and are divorcing, that would be a tough work situation. With the way that some people are...I would not trust him.
by mtnvly   2418 Posts
Posted on 5/28/2008 7:20 AM
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Talk to an attorney - don't take any job just yet.  Start divorce proceedings or mediation ASAP and then plot a future for yourself which includes getting a job.
by mma   18 Posts
Posted on 5/28/2008 2:11 AM
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Im no lawyer, but i believe that sposal support is based on your most recent job and the salary you had there.  A friend quit her job and the court used that salary (appx) to determine what she could  / should make in the future.... 

While i like to look for the best in each of us, one could argue he is potentialy setting a high mark for the alimony.  Or he is telling the truth!

I alsp believe knowledge is power, so arm yourself asap!  go talk to an attn now.....  just so you know....
by firecracker   153 Posts
Posted on 5/27/2008 11:14 PM
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