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my husband wants to get a divorce but remain together . he feels that we jumped into marriage to soon. we married after being together for a year because we had got custody of his two children , our lawyer told us if we are seriouse about each other and want custody of his children we should get married. well we had the girls for one year then the judge gave them back to the mother now he feels we married for the wrong reason and wants a divorce .. i married because i loved him i thought that was why we went ahead with it and thats what he told me... now he said he only did it for them.. im lost ???? dont know what to do

by janelle 15 Posts
Posted on 5/19/2008 3:28 PM

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Answers for "lost" (3) (You must be logged in to answer)

if he wants to stay together - then tell him it is marriage counseling and working on things together, or you want to end it completely so you can find someone who is serious about commitment.

If he isn't willing to go to counseling - he just used you for his own needs (the kids) and you are worth more than that.

by spaznskitz 2757 Posts
Posted on 5/21/2008 1:08 AM

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Yarcmix is right. Divorcing and staying together is not an answer; it's an excuse. Is your husband unhappy with your relationship? You need to talk about his reasons. Try to work this out. If he's unwilling to work, then something else must be up. I wish you the best. And feel free to post and ask more questions. There are a lot of good voices here willing to help.

by Robert-Boyd 3303 Posts
Posted on 5/19/2008 4:00 PM

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Well, if his reasoning for getting married was to gain custody of his children... Does that show he really takes marriage seriously? Obviously, you married him out of love and commiting to a purpose that really doesn't yield any gain for you... Why would he want a divorce and remain together? To me, it just seems that doesn't add up. You may want to dive deeper into his reasoning for the divorce and find out more, because divorce and remain together adds up to dating and seeking other relationships without the consequence of adultery and having to go to court behind it. Good luck and stay strong, everything will work out for the best for You.

by yarcmix 28 Posts
Posted on 5/19/2008 3:47 PM

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lost

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definitions from "alimony" to "writ of execution"

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