Search our site

divorce360.com provides help, advice and community for people
contemplating, going through or recovering from divorce and the issues around it,
including separation, divorce laws, spousal support and emotional issues.

Community  :: Chat  :: Answers

Answers
You can search for Answers by tag here:


Invite Others
Invite friends and family to join you on d360! - Click here

where do I start
Our checklists are a great place to start. They are organized along the divorce timeline: deciding, beginning, process, ongoing and moving on. Select the one that is right for you.

Question

   Posted to group - Chat    <<Previous    Next>>

lonely

my husband and i are still together even though i know hes cheating.its getting harder and harder to stay but i have no money and still waiting for my disability to go thru. i am so lonely. he sleeps in the basement and doesnt even hug me or kiss me anymore. i never thought i could feel anymore alone but every day seems to get worse. i dont know if he even loves me anymore. when i try to tal to him hes just nasty. i dont know what to do.there doesnt seem to be any end in sight i could sure use some advice
by fritz 
Posted on 5/8/2008 6:06 PM    
Sent to Friendsend to friend
   
Tags: people groups
0


read more from user >>

Answer s for "lonely"  (9) (You must be logged in to answer)
we had another big fight today. i brought up shirley and he blew. the day before he too me out to eat and to a movie but not any ind of love did he show me when it was time to go to bed i went to hug him and he patted me on the bac like a friend it ate at me all day and night i guess thats why i brought her up again i guess shes getting all the love from him that i use to get he told me he wants a divorce but will i do still waiting on disability and its going slow does he have to pay me alimoney and how much would it be i want our home woulld i be able to keep it i dont want to move and he could move in with shirley she has a home but he says he wont that i should get out what do you all thin any advice
by fritz  29 Posts
Posted on 5/13/2008 12:58 AM
0

no you aren't terrible - you are human.
by spaznskitz  1213 Posts
Posted on 5/9/2008 10:37 PM
0

its terrible but i went and had my hair done today and a man did my hair and i felt so guilty but having a man  even touch my head made me miss the touch of my husbands hands. its been so long sometimes i feel like being with another man. having someone hold me tight and know that they cared about me and enjoyed being with me. i know im awful but its been so long every little bit of it i miss. im terrible arent i.
by fritz  29 Posts
Posted on 5/9/2008 5:33 PM
0

Take Spankitz advice.  You need to focus on you and not on him.  Do this for yourself and not to try to get him back.  On www.survivinginfidelity.com there is a great concept of the 180.  Its in the FAQ for BS (betrayed spouses).  It will help you heal.  My comment on social services was to see if they could help you get into counseling due to financial issues but it seems you have that covered.
by falcon81  121 Posts
Posted on 5/9/2008 12:07 PM
0

fritz

sweetie - you gotta get out of the house hun. and I don't mean just to the therapist. Are your son and grandkds close? It's time to go spend quality time with them - kids and pets always cheer a person up.

Check your local park district or community college - find a fun class to take - learn something new. Volunteer somewhere.

turn the tables on him - make him wonder where the heck YOU are...
by spaznskitz  1213 Posts
Posted on 5/9/2008 2:43 AM
0

i made another appointment to go to counseling but he got really madand said i didnt ask him about it and i had to cancel it you know i dont understand if he cares so much about her why is he still here with me i told him to leave and go live with her but he said it wasnt like that but i know he goes there all the time why doesnt just leave me
by fritz  29 Posts
Posted on 5/9/2008 2:21 AM
0

sounds like he is "checked out" of this marriage.  Does he say he wants to work on this marriage or is he just "done".  you might want work on you and move on.  Life is too short to wait on him to make all the decisions.  Do what is right for you and be happy.
by Barkley  755 Posts
Posted on 5/8/2008 9:21 PM
0

dear falcon i go to counseling every week but sometimes that doesnt even help. what could social services do for me?
by fritz  29 Posts
Posted on 5/8/2008 7:18 PM
0

Are you in counseling?  If not you need to go see someone.  Call social services and see if they can help.  You need someone to talk through these issues with and obviously your husband is not it.
by falcon81  121 Posts
Posted on 5/8/2008 6:14 PM
0





Divorce360.com is not a substitute for advice from a lawyer, accountant, financial planner, therapist or other professional to obtain advice. Divorce360.com is not intended to, and should not, take the place of professional advice. The opinions expressed in the divorce360.com message boards are those of the autho