Been married for 18 years, have two kids under 12, and 2 dogs.  Husband and I moved 8 years ago, and it seems to me that he has been unhappy since.  He has no friends here.  I have lots of friends.  He is not as outgoing as I am.  Where we lived prior to this our complete social life consisted of his family and his one friend.  He is a cranky person.  The kids don't even want to go in the room where he is sometimes and they tell me so.  He is not a very hard worker.  No desire to do better for his family.  I earn more than he does, carry the insurance, have all the benefits.  I pay the bills, clean the house, remember everything.  He has a poor memory.  And won't write things down.  I guess it sounds like I am angry.  I know I am.  I just want someone to share the responsibilities with me 50/50.  Is that such a big deal?   Anyway I told him this.  He wants to go to counseling and thinks I communicate badly.  I probably do!! I don't even want to go.  So what if I communicate if he can't remember what I say or ask?  I have sent him to the MD twice, thinking these were signs of depression.  Nope.  Not the case.  I think I have made up my mind but don't know how to tell him.  He is the father of our children, and I am mostly worried about the kids and how they will react to this.  They go to catholic school, we are a catholic family, and I feel like failure.  The little things are really starting to get to me.  I don't even want to be around him and to top it off he follows me everywhere and wants to know where I am going even when I step out the door to check on the kids!!!  I feel smothered.  He says he is embarassed by me because I am "wild" but he will not define "wild" .  I am not happy with im because he does not like my family, he yells at the kids, and he is rude to my friends sometimes.  So I guess I am looking for some opinions here.  Is it worth going to counseling?  I have gone before, by myself because he didn't think he needed to go.  This time he is asking for the counseling together.