My ex and I have been divorced since 08/07.  It was a tough divorce, he was angry, mean and hurt.  I wanted the divorce after 16 years of trying to work things out.  But I believe we can be friendly.  I've held to that belief.  Our problems could have been easily solved with counseling but my ex was in denial and was so angry that I could even think of leaving him.

I still want him in my life but we can't live together.  I can't count on him for anything.  We can talk to each other about our children, about our friends, and about our family.

My question is, how do I remain friends when I know he wants to get back together?  I've made it clear I can't do that not now and possibly not ever.  I've told him my reasons.  He's currently a financial mess.  He's lost our house and moved in with his mother.  I have bill collectors calling me for his debt.  These are things that I can't afford to put myself back into.

Also, I want to date.  I want to see what else is out there.  I have and things became bad with my ex and I again.  I have since ended the relationship and my ex and I are getting along good. 

It's important for me to remain friends.  We have children that will only benefit from a healthy relationship between us.