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What to do when "soon to be ex spouse" won't sign papers to sell house?

Since filing for divorce, my "soon to be ex spouse" has made life miserable for the kids and I. He refuses to help pay for any household bills ( kids and I live in house) in addition to the mortgage payment. Unfortunately, my income doesn't stack up to his.The mortgage company will accept reduced payments for the next 3 months. We have quite a bit of equity.. he'd be foolish to let the house go into foreclosure. Unfortunately, he refuses to sign any papers to refinance or sell the house. The lawyers, realtor and I are frustrated... is there anything else that can be done in a divorce situation?

by KN3   1 Post 
Posted on 5/14/2012 7:39 PM
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Answers for "What to do when "soon to be ex spouse" won't sign papers to sell house?"  (6) (You must be logged in to answer)

The judge in my case ordered me to pay the mortgage and for her to stay in the house with her cats (no kids). The judge also ordered the house to be sold. But the ex would not cooperate with the realtor. She wanted to continue living rent-free in the house. It took three years to get the house sold.
by RustBelt   20 Posts
Posted on 8/20/2014 2:06 PM

You've said your atty is frustrated, but you don't say what your atty has done to correct this situation. If there haven't been any temporary orders, WHY NOT? That is what you pay the atty for! 

So, yeah, get moving, get rid of said atty if he/she hasn't done anything to get you some financial relief, and go after the jerk for not supporting his kids. 

And that is how you should look at it. He's not doing this to YOU (even though that IS how he looks at it), he's doing this to the kids. And now it's time for him to act like an adult instead of a spoiled child who is throwing a temper tantrum. 


Zen Hugs
by worried2tears   2308 Posts
Posted on 5/15/2012 10:35 AM

I've seen the scenario Mike's related happen with others - it's not pretty. Or nice. Or fair. It is legal, though, unless you get those temporary orders to get it stopped. An attorney is well worth the fee you'll pay her/him to get it done.


I've also seen it backfire, horribly, when a galpal's STBX was headed down that road, then ended up in jail and lost his job - his "house money" ended up being spent on fines and attorneys, and they lost their home in the process.


We're here for you.

by NotJulieG   3319 Posts
Posted on 5/15/2012 10:16 AM

Let me clarify that foreclosure rules vary by state, and that I'm not a lawyer or a loan expert.

My point was though, that letting the bank actually take the house would be foolish of him, but "letting the house go into foreclosure" is a not uncommon tactic. 

Foreclosure takes a long time--typically a year or more.  When the house is foreclosed upon, that is when the clock starts.  During that time, the bank does not have to accept partial payments but it will accept a total repayment of the loan (obviously) and in most cases must accept repayment of all of the arrears.

So, by not paying the mortgage or any other bills, he is putting pressure on you.  By saving up his income, he will be able to save the house from foreclosure later.  Meanwhile he is depleting your finances, making it hard for you to pay your lawyer, etc.

Get the temporary orders, ASAP.
by mike1493   3673 Posts
Posted on 5/15/2012 9:16 AM

You need to file for temporary support orders if you haven't already.  Along with a temporary restraining order that keeps both of you from "squandering marital assets."  And when you can get him in front of a judge, you need the court to order him to either make the payments or agree to sell the house.  Or both.

He does have rights here.  He doesn't have to sell, but he will be ordered to either allow the sale or buy you out eventually.

One tactic I have seen used, by people in your stbx's position, is to allow the house to go into foreclosure as a negotiating strategy.  He is draining your resources while saving money on his side.  Then later when you've given up on the house he swoops in and saves it from foreclosure for himself.

Even if he doesn't get the house in the end, his tactic of saving his own money and forcing you to spend yours works for him in the short run.  You need to get court orders asap to keep afloat financially.

If this goes past the 3 months, just keep sending in those reduced payments.  The bank can't foreclose until 90 days after they start refusing partial payments.
by mike1493   3673 Posts
Posted on 5/15/2012 8:55 AM

He refuses.  Do you put the papers in front of him?  I would think the lawyer would know how to proceed in this matter.
by haboo   1075 Posts
Posted on 5/14/2012 10:51 PM

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