I think the narrow path is what I should take. the path that maybe harder but could also be rewarding in the end.  If God is for us who can be against us. I am learning that Love is a Choice. It's an action, love acts.  Love serves. Love is persistence and committment. Love sacrifices, it sustains, it's sharing and Love will be tested as well as your faith.  I am learning that it isn't easy. It really is an uphill climb.  I'm learning that the devil wants us to be miserable but God wants us to have faith and follow him.  I am stronger when I follow God and his Word daily. Without God life will be harder.  I am still learning. Life has its battles and we need to learn how to defend and protect ourselves whenever the enemy the devil wants to attack us. 

Diamond, I have been reading your entries and want to let you know that I pray for your happiness and your husbands...do keep us up to date on what you start to find out about yourself.

Hi Diamond, I've been following your posts. You seem to be handling things pretty well - don't be hard on yourself. You just got back from a life-changing ordeal and I'm pretty sure that you changed a lot after being in Iraq. My goodness - who wouldn't! So now here you are living with a man who maybe hasn't changed - you have to see his point of view too. You know, there's nothing wrong with admitting you've changed and maybe your husband deserves a chance to know this new person. Give yourself a chance to be happy with YOU. Take some time to find out what that means. Life is short and fragile. Why not enjoy every moment of it? Diamond, I was married to a man that cheated, lied, and was abusive among other things - you know, I always thought I was a loser for not trying harder to save my marriage. Once I took a step back and saw myself from the outside in - I realized that I had tried and I had done everything I could to save my marriage - the one thing I hadn't done was take care of ME. Once I focused on myself, everything else fell into place. You're right, you know, you can't make anyone happy until you're happy. I'm back to posting and reading here - I was out of commission for a few days due to being sick. Please keep posting - it helps and what's more I think the anonimity helps you more. No one here is ever going to judge you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. You're not alone; this community (myself included) is here to help, listen and chat. Hang in there!

Of course you're in my prayers Diamond. And if you need to vent, I'm here for that too.  Be strong and courageous my friend.

diamond,  you do seem like you are finding peace with your situation.  You are right you can not worry about the negatives right now.  Stay positive and know we are all praying for you.  When do you come home from Iraq?  Take this time to find yourself and realize what you want out of life.   This is time for you everything will work out for the best when you return home and get your life in order.  Please feel free to chat anytime, this is  a great website!!!