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Sounds fishy to me

Hearing coming up on March 1, to show that stbx can find work. Judge ordered a work search (30 places). I found out that my stbx is going in to have surgery this week to have some lymph nodes removed (melanoma). Now, he had a PET scan done a few months ago and was told it was completely clear-even told the judge last time we were in court. I strongly believe he's trying to get out of looking for work. Obviously, when we go to court he's going to have to bring proof to give to Child Support services and the judge, correct? On the phone he told our daughter he's been going to counseling. He's a drug addict and he's always said he suffers from bi-polar or depression (he denies he's an addict). I'm very concerned that some doctor is going to write him a note saying he can't work. He's a liar! He had our doctor put him on disability instead of unemployment because the benefits paid more. I've written my declarations and submitted them (stating the kind of work he's done in the past), and attached copies of his old check stubs and pages of places showing employment opportunities for him. I was told I can give testimony at the hearing so I've partially prepared a statement. In it I state how he's been basically mooching off his family and how he lied to our family doctor to put him on disability, that he blames ME for his addiction, etc. If he does bring a note from a doctor, what happens? Is that it, I'm out of luck? Will I have a chance to speak my peace to the judge?

by lucky3   15 Posts 
Posted on 2/19/2012 9:53 PM
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Thanks Spaz! I got his Fl-150 form in the mail today. He put on there that he has stage 3 cancer. Told our son in a voice mail the other day that I can get it out of my head that he'll be looking for work because he needs treatment. From what I gather he'll be in the hospital a few days. If he does in fact need treatment that doesn't preclude him from working. His disability and unemployment has run out (he hasn't worked in about 2 years) so he says he's going to try and get SSI. From what I've read that isn't always easy to get and just having a diagnosis of cancer doesn't mean you'll automatically get it. I will definitely leave out him blaming me for his drug addiction. I did put it in my declaration though so too late for that but I won't put it in my statement I prepare for the court. If he says things about me to our son can I use that? I feel it would show his ambivalence towards me and thus show his not paying support or wanting to pay support is his way of retaliating. NotJulieG, he's on probation so he's supposed to get drug tested regularly. I have my doubts that is happening though since sometimes when he calls the kids he sounds under the influence. I'll gladly be drug tested; they can even test my hair lol.
by lucky3   15 Posts
Posted on 2/22/2012 10:24 PM
0





hey sorry, been busy...

as far as the testing of the lymph nodes, if one is swollen, it is standard procedure to remove and test, it is outpatient - not that big of a deal, and nothing that will keep him from working, or looking for work...unless there ends up being a diagnosis of cancer...then he can go on disability...and yes this judge all things considered will expect proof - if he doesn't bring it - or the 30 job application proof - he's in deep shit.

On'y thing I'd keep out of your statement is that he blames you for thie addiction - that is irrelevant - keep it to the facts that he has the ability to work unless there is 100% proof he is seriously ill...

based on our last conversation...the judge has him pegged for what he is...and there will be a low tolerance for bullshit...
by spaznskitz   10634 Posts
Posted on 2/22/2012 12:32 AM
0





I'm not a lawyer, but what I am is someone who believes that it all works out the way it's supposed to - I'll be praying that whoever the judge is has the wisdom to see the situation for what it is and make the best decision for you and yours.

 

If he's an addict, why not ask to have him tested? Volunteer to be tested yourself, too - a really good move if you know without a doubt that your test will come up clean. You might get some guidance from a drug abuse hotline. I have little tolerance for substance abusers; my bias may lead you down a path not in your best interests - get legal advice on this before you suggest it.

 

The resident legal expert will likely chime in, as you posted this in the right place.

 

We're here for you.

by NotJulieG   305 Posts
Posted on 2/21/2012 11:53 PM
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