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   Posted to group - Should I Stay or Should I Go    <<Previous    Next>>

unhappy...and it shows

Do you think I am being selfish when i say this about my feelings and wanting to be happy? I feel terrible. I'm still in this marriage eventhough my heart is not in it & I am at the same time unhappy.  I don't want to be a bad person but I want to be happy

by diamond Posted

by diamond    31 Posts   
Posted on 2/16/2008 4:27 PM    
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Answers for "unhappy...and it shows"  (5) (You must be logged in to answer)
I know that if i'm not happy i won't make anyone else happy.  Are you saying that i should stay with my spouse and work on me at the same time or something else?
by diamond   31 Posts
Posted on 2/18/2008 8:23 PM
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Thanks for the response guys. I am feeling guilty because I have been divorced before and I feel like I am dishonoring God twice if I do this separation but Lord knows I am in need of some happiness. My husband says I need to change and be happy. he says he doesn't know how I'm going to be happy, i have to find it myself but I am not happy with him at the same time. He doesn't complete me.
by diamond   31 Posts
Posted on 2/17/2008 12:29 PM
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Wanting to be happy doesn't make you bad. And in your circomstance I don't think it makes you selfish.  You seem like a good enough person.  I know you said you tried couples counselling and that didn't work for you.  Have you considered a Therapist for you?  Not because you need to be fixed or anything, but because you have a lot of inner conflict.  The guilt and the feelings of wanting out, you should talk to a professional who can help you sort through them.  SuYin is a member here.  She got one for herself before her divorce, and I know she says the therapy helped.  You might talk to her if you're considering it.  And as always, the rest of us are here too.  But sometimes you need more help than the guy who talks to himself in the mirror and blogs about MyUnwife.  ;)
by Robert-Boyd   2783 Posts
Posted on 2/17/2008 3:42 AM
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You need to be happy!  You are not selfish.  Have you talked to your husband about how you feel? 
by Barkley   817 Posts
Posted on 2/16/2008 7:39 PM
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If you are not happy, you'll never make anyone else happy. You have to work on yourself first. If you don't take care of your needs, who will? You should be happy and your husband deserves to be with someone who is happy to be with him.
by thisisnotworkinganymore   3 Posts
Posted on 2/16/2008 7:20 PM
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