Can't we just be friendly?

I think there's a world of difference between getting on with your life and wanting to be friends. 
You clearly do still care, and she's playing with that. It's cruel. 
I can see being civil. It sounds like you are. Friendship? Please.

I think you have every right to feel that way, too bad it is such a hard thing to keep inside. I am at the beginning of almost the same thing, I care, she initiated, I want to work on the marriage. I am 99% positive that it will end on divorce. She told me today the reason it does not bother her is because she can just stop feeling. Must be nice, wish I could. Just have to protect our 3 sons and hope in a year or more I will be able to look back and say Wheew glad I got rid of her sorry ass

There is a difference between friendly and friends.   I am friendly to my ex because 1) I want him to know that I am happy with my life without him 2) I don't want to fight with him about useless things 3) He hates the idea that I'm not sitting around crying about life without him.   
I will never be friends with him. If I ever get to the point where I think about it, I have saved every nasty email, every crude disgusting voicemail and documentation of every sick, cruel thing that he's done. I'll just take a trip down memory lane and forget that idea quickly.  Do I do things with him that seem friendly? We went to parent/teacher conferences together and the teacher commented to me later that she was gladdened (she actually used that word - who says gladdened?) that we could come together so well.  I just smiled knowing that I'd put on a good act and that it probably meant something to my daughter that we were both there.  Honestly, I hate being in the same room with him. He's an asshole.
I'm not sure what forgivness is.  If it means that I don't feel hatred for what he's done, then I hope to one day forgive. My ex thinks forgivness means that you forget the past. I never want to do that. Some things you just can't take back. He hurt my children and that's not something that I am willing to forgive.

V - Sorry about the doughnuts.  Glad you could give them away before they went bad.  Think of that as a good deed!

I don't think it has anything to do with 'being over' anyone.  It has directly to do with the fact that this individual has done so many things to try and embarrass and cost me thousands of dollars, that I don't want anything to do with her.  Ever.  Co-parenting yes, anything else, absolutely not.

I'm over wanting her back, or wanting our relationship to work or reconciliation for the sake of our marriage and our son.  I'm so much more deserving of better things, and those things are starting to make their appearance.

I can certainly understand your bitterness....

It appears she is ready to move forward and you are not. Take your time, take care of yourself. Only when you are ready will you be able to respond back till then keep her on the back burner.

I will let you know what the ex pulled this past Saturday. So, it is 49 degrees in Houston..yes, it is FREEZING for Houston weather.  Boys had a soccer game. I was suppose to bring 3 dozen donuts at 8:30AM. I get up at 7:30AM, shower, dress and off  I go in search of donuts.  I show up to park....empty.

Games were cancelled.  The ex and coach did not have the courtesy to call and let me know. I felt like the biggest fool. I drove back home wondering if I should cry or laugh.

I called the boyfriend and started crying.  I felt humiliated. How could he be that much of a jerk. He was.  Hope he feels good about it. 

And about those donuts.. I hate 2 and gave the rest to my daughter's soccer team and parents :-)

Hang in there HIC.