When to file to move to another state with child?

My divorce is on hold due to my STBX filing bankruptcy. We're in MD and bankruptcy court supercedes divorce court re: financial matters (outside of alimony and child support)

I have a Pendente Lite order from the judge awarding me full physical custody and joint legal custody. The order states that no additional evidence will be heard regarding custody when we eventually return to court after the bankruptcy.

I've been unemployed since last Dec and was offered a job in Las Vegas. This is a huge promotion and the cost of living is much lower in LV. I live in MD right now. I can't afford more than a cheap apt, if that. In LV I could afford a 4-BR single family home with a pool in a gated community. I would also have health insurance.

As I mentioned my STBX filed bankruptcy, has no savings, no assets, no car (has a company car) and is living almost 100% off his mistress.

I believe I have a good case for relocating with my son. If I can't move with my son, I won't move and even though we have a place to live at the moment that won't last long if I don't get a job within the next two months. This job I've been offered will allow me to work from home until I relocate, with the understanding that I will relocate otherwise I won't be able to take/keep the job. I also need a job for the health insurance.

I have no attorney because I'm completely broke. I'm representing myself.

So my question is: do I file a petition now to be heard on the custody matter (if so, what am I filing?) or do I wait until after we go back to court and I get full custody officially (not Pendente Lite).

I really want to have my petition heard by the current judge because he understands the entire situation regarding the divorce (adultury, illigimate child, bankruptcy, not paying ANY joint bills/debts) and I've done very well in front of this judge winning most all of my requests. I'm afraid if I wait until after I'm awarded full custody in a final order that I'll end up in front of a different judge to be heard on the relocation request and not all the judges in the county are as good as the one I have. I couldn't have gotten a better judge for my situation.

by BecksMom 232 Posts
Posted on 10/29/2009 8:19 PM

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Tags: legal , custody , relocation
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Answers for "When to file to move to another state with child?" (1) (You must be logged in to answer)

I get that this judge undertands all that - but when it comes to moving away - that is a WHOLE other animal. You moving clear across the country for a job seriously affects your stbx's legal right to see his child. His joint legal is a big factor in this - he has a say - a big say - in if he is ok with him moving or not.

You say you think you have a strong case, well if you are basing it on his past - that isn't a good case at all. It doesn't matter if he is being supported by his gf or not - and he has transportation (company car or self owned, same thing - it's transportation) Does he see his son regularly? Is he active in his life? You both are unemployed right now, the judge can easily say for the sake of the child you have to find employment here.

It may say that custody won't be heard, but that is based on you staying where you are - the fact you want to up and move that far away, opens up the door for him to seek a change in physcial custody based on a MAJOR change in circumstance.

Do you have a written formal job offer? Do you have proof of your offered salary? Do you have proof by way of a pre-loan approval or rental agreement of where you would actually move to? Can you prove the schools would be better? Can you adequately show how you will continue to keep his father active in his life, as well as his extended family? Can you shoulder most of the burden of travel expenses since you will be the one moving?

You can file a motion to relocate at any point, but you need to have your ducks in a very straight row, you only get one shot at it really - and filing it opens a whole pandora's box of avenues for him...

by spaznskitz 7745 Posts
Posted on 10/30/2009 12:22 PM

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