Starting over but feeling stuck...

First, baddlizz, I have no answers but I'm doing a pretty good job of faking it!

I had the same stuck feeling. I think it's depression. I got a book about it called 'Unstuck' and couldn't get unstuck enough to read it. HA!
I finally read part of it. It said to get up, put on your favorite music and dance. Surprisingly, this helped a lot!

I also sat down and tried to make a list of things important to me and how I could go about making them part of my life. I have still been working on that. It helps a lot to say, what do I want in relationships? Marriage, friendship, what? WHat do I want for income? Start a business? Get a job? Keep trading stocks? Making it concrete is a lot more valuable to me than what do you want, which is too vague to answer.

Now I make lists each day of what I have to do. I only allow an hour or two for each thing. If I don't finish, I come back the next day. Then I start the next thing. I even put in time to shop, exercise, ride my horse and veg out. That gives me a goal.

It's helping! I visited another member on this site and we went dancing this week. I told her I was depressed.She said I could have fooled her. We'd been laughing, singing and dancing for about 8 hours by then. Imagine me not depressed! Ha! My depression is mostly that stuck feeling, but it is getting better.

I think you're doing the right things. I'd add to get out and dance, or even dance at home, write lists so you have something to check off which makes you feel like you accomplished something.

To rjakjr, I don't have the answers, but I remember when my mother was dying. You don't get a do over. When she was dying I moved across the country to be near her, even though long term, financially, it wasn't the best move. I wouldn't trade those last days with my mother for all of the riches in the world.

You don't explain if you've been in that one location for a long time or not, if you have then that explains why it's hard for you to come to terms with a major move like what you're describing.

My soon-to-be ex is doing the same thing with me. It's a little bit different since her dad is dying of cancer and she found out about it on her birthday from her mom back in July. (She insists it's because we argue and she insists we shouldn't argue--at all, which I think is crazy to say that.) We have a 6-year old and 3-year old, both boys, that she plans on taking with her from here in Washington state to Utah where her parents and some of her family are. (No, she's not Mormon.) She's been having a big issue with her little plan as well. Her parents are in serious financial trouble, her dad's cancer is forcing him to stay at home and her mom is only part-time as a daycare worker for an alternative high school watching the teenage girl's kids when they finish their diploma. Needless to say, her parents are barely making ends meet, they're living off part-time wages from her mom along with medicade and food stamps all to pay a new car payment and a mortgage each month. Yet... somehow... taking our 2 boys down there to live with her parents with all that they're dealing with is somehow a good idea... to her.

Myself, on the other hand, am very stable where I'm at here in Washington state. I'm active duty Air National Guard working on McChord AFB, we're still in the on-base housing which is good for a secure neighborhood but bad because they take the whole allotment for the privatized housing. Either way, the difference of what I have here in Washington state compared to what she plans going to in Utah is like night and day.

So, you tell me, who's the logical one in this???