Phone calls

Enjoy the calls with the kids.  Everything I've read about kids in this situations suggests that the kids really benefit from consistent, frequent contact with both parents.  I have two girls under 10, and we both appreciate the calls.  Although the younger one rarely wants to say more than "I love you, goodnight," I still think it's nice to have the contact.  They call my ex (or she calls them) when they are with me, and I think it's great.I rarely speak with my ex during these calls - only if we need to discuss something about the kids.  Our kids are young enough so the don't ask detailed questions about where I am/was, but if it gets to the stage where they start prying, I'll just be vague.I would NOT say anything to your ex about these call, even if she is using the calls to pry.  If you ever have occasion to comment on the calls, I would suggest somethiong positive, like you are glad that your respective situations allows you to have so much contact with your children.  Any statements that are less than positive will have the potential of being twisted into an argument that you don't really want contact with your kids.   From your post, it appears that it's only been two months since your attempt at reconciliation didn't work.  That was obviously disappointing and painful, and it's only been two months.  You're likely still hurting (I know I would be in the same circumstances), and while you now know that it's not going to work, accepting that and getting past the pain will not occur overnight.  I know, I've been there.  I say all this, because, to the extent you can, try to keep your relationship with your kids separate from your relationship with your stbx.  When it comes to things like calls with the kids, it may be helpful to ask yourself whether the calls are good for your kids and your relationship with them.  If the calls are, continue them, and deal with the fact that your stbx may be prying in some other way (or better yet, ignore it).  Hang in there!

She might be checking up on you, and that wouldn't surprise me but at least you get to say goodnite. So just skirt around the questions and don't give her the satisfaction, but enjoy the calls from the little ones.

Thanks for the responses.  It's tough because even the thought of this woman makes me sick.  But.... this is why I look to this site for helping cooler heads prevail.

I have to say that you should enjoy the fact that your kids are calling you! No matter what the reason. They need that contact with you- and need you to be a part of their lives as much as possible.
You need not reveal any info that you don't want her to have. They are in a rountine of calling you at the same time so you can plan around it! Any person who would not understand this and not get upset about a phone call from them is not worth your time!
There may come a time where they don't call you( teenagers tend to do this) so enjoy it!

I have to ask.. does it matter?  You can choose what you tell the kids you are doing and don't have to divulge any information you don't want to.  And so what, if it gets back to the X?  Is it so bad for her to learn you have a life?

I only say that because I have a similar arrangement.  The kids will call for goodnight calls every night I don't have them.  I absolutely love having that contact with them on my off nights, regardless of what I'm doing.  Sometimes my kids ask me what I'm up to.. other times they don't.  My calls usually end with a short conversation with the ex to go over any relavent happenings, so if I happen to be somewhere noisy, he can usually tell if I'm out.  But I wouldn't give up the phone calls over worry that he may know what I'm up to.  Who cares.  If the questions get asked, I keep it simple.  I'm out.  If the kids pry.. I'll add something noncommital like.. at a friends, out to dinner, at the movies, etc...  I don't divulge with who, or if it's a date or actual location.  Keeps my privacy without seeming like I have something to hide... and really.. if the ex gets jealous cause I have a life, then let him.  He walked out on me, not my problem if he has issues with me moving on!