What to make of this?

Call it what you will, you said yourself that you've only paid your credit card and your car payment 'till now.

Thing is, you're not owed anything more than a man would be, if things were reversed and he was in the exact same situation you're in now. It's hard to stomach, but it's true.

We're each of us responsible for ourselves, independent of our gender. You'd better get used to that, your kids are counting on you.

He is a confused man who doesnt know what he is doing. When we have low self esteem and issues from our past that we have never dealt with everything is always someone else's fault. We cant take a long look in the mirror with out turning away and pointing the finger elsewhere. The affair is like a drug to make him feel better about himself. Until he understands himself and gets help, the roller coaster will just keep going until you jump off or the track fails because of the friction and it all comes crashing down.

Find out for your self why you are putting up with it. Do you have codependency issues.

For me my heart still jumps up into my throat when ever I see her or hear her voice. No matter how angry I am toward her actions I know that I have some ownership of them as well. I can truly see trust and forgiveness happen eventually between us. So I know that I really still love her. Faith in God is great...but the ways in which he helps you may not always obvious. What his plan for you may not always be what you have in mind.

Find inner happiness. Do not allow the crap you are going thru keep you from having a little sunshine each day.
 
Ask yourself.... Do you love him? If not...what are you doing.

No, natalie, I have a job, my stbx wants me to start helping to pay the house bills.  Since we have been married I have not paid any bills except my credit cards and car payment.  I am not living off his labor...I believe that the man should take care of his family....which that consist of paying the household bills.  What my complaint is how dare you ask me to help with some bills, when 3 month ago you wanted to put me out with a thousand dollars and my car.

Sig, I have mixed feeling about the marriage...I do not trust him, but I do trust God.  My ex has played on my feelings too many times for me to let my guard down.  I think he is trying to play on my feeling again.  But, if I allow it to happen again I will be the fool.

He's having an affair? That should be enough for you, it was for me.

You may have to get used to paying your bills again, though. Not having done so before isn't really a reason why you shouldn't now, and I'm confused by this.

 

I'd suggest doing your best to keep your current job, or if you don't have one dust off the old resume and perhaps think about taking a class or two to make you more employable. The days of living off of someone else's labor are drawing to a close for you, like it or not.

 

 

Sounds like he is jerking you around and trying to place the blame on you for his affair. 
Do you want the marriage to work? If so I recommend you both get into marriage counseling. 
Most of all take care of you.