what would happen if i move out of the country?

what would the implications be for my current situation? i haven't even file for divorce yet, after too many yrs of every type of abuse i need a break and i need to go away for my kids, for me, for peace of mind.

i want to go to my mom's for a while, but what happens to the house since its in both our names, if he doesn't put in the check and i'm not able to pay? i do all the payments to the house and i do it online.

the way things are going with my husband i'm not sure how much longer i can stay in this situation so i need a break, i need to think, i need to know what to do without regreting it later.

he is also the president to his company but his father kick him out so he no longer works in the business that it was supposed to be his to begin with but he still gets a check, a smaller amount but enough to pay the mortgage for now.

My son is almost 18 so the main problem is with my daughter, she just turn 10. i have sign her up for an excellent school back home. since we live in fl i don't know if there"s something he can say alleging i'm leaving taking the kids. i do plan to come back eventually, but in my situation now, with no money soon no car, i'm more secure there. I don't work, i was a stay at home mom for all this 10 yrs of marriage, 5 months away to be 11 yrs. i have never work in my life. i'm not sure of anything because i'm afraid but i know i need to get away bc the situation is abusing, violent, and unsafe living conditions...

thanks for helping me...

by romina 10 Posts
Posted on 4/13/2009 1:18 PM

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Tags: separation , leaving the country , children , sadness , divorce , husband , abuse , mental abuse , desperate , scared
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Answers for "what would happen if i move out of the country?" (3) (You must be logged in to answer)

you need to get divorced first, get the home, the custody of the children taken care of before you even think about leaving the country.

You could be looking at a forclosure on your record when it comes to the house and a potential international parental kidnapping charges if you just take off.

by spaznskitz 7745 Posts
Posted on 4/14/2009 1:18 PM

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What is abuse?

One out of every four American women will experience violence by an intimate partner sometime during her lifetime, according to a 1999 study by the National Institute of Justice and Centers for Disease Control. Of those victimized by an intimate partner, 85 percent are women and 15 percent are men.

That means that women are five to eight times more likely than men to be victimized, according the U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics Factbook. And only about 1 in five of domestic violence victims who are injured in an attack will get medical help.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines abuse as:

Calling bad names or putting someone down
Shouting and cursing
Hitting, slapping and/or pushing
Making threats of any kind
Jealousy and suspicion
Keeping someone away from family and friends - isolation
Throwing things around the house

To recognize whether your partner is abusing you, ask whether your partner:

Embarrasses you with put-downs?
Looks at you or acts in ways that scare you?
Controls what you do, who you see or talk to or where you go?
Stops you from seeing your friends or family members?
Takes your money, makes you ask for money or refuses to give you money?
Makes all of the decisions?
Tells you that you’re a bad parent or threatens to take away or hurt your children?
Prevents you from working or attending school?
Acts like the abuse is no big deal, it’s your fault, or even denies doing it?
Destroys your property or threatens to kill your pets?
Intimidates you with guns, knives or other weapons?
Shoves you, slaps you, chokes you or hits you?
If you have contacted law enforcement, forces you to try and drop charges?
Threatens to commit suicide?
Threatens to kill you?

by paula1 12662 Posts
Posted on 4/13/2009 1:56 PM

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are there police records on this abuse?

have you contacted an abuse hotline to learn what you can/can't do?

are your children safe?

if they are not safe...and/or if you are not safe...get out right now.

please don't do anything that will put any of you into harm....and don't do anythign that breaks the law.....

pre divorce paperwork, it's the wild west out there...meaning either parent can do whatever they want.....leave town, etc. but once that paperwork starts, you must follow the rules....

please talk to a lawyer or legal aid about how to do this correctly.

and please call an abuse hot line right now:

by paula1 12662 Posts
Posted on 4/13/2009 1:56 PM

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