should i be scared?

my wife and i are getting a divorce within the very near future. We have a 2yr old son, and right now while we are separated, we've been splitting up the week with him. For example, one week I would have him four days out of the week, and she would have him for three, and then the next week I would have him for three and she would have him for four. I was wondering if we did go to court for our divorce, if there would be any way she could try to keep my son away from me?

by peteyS 2 Posts
Posted on 3/11/2009 2:37 AM

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New Jersey legal questions on divorce360.com

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Tags: good dad , nervous , custody ,
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Answers for "should i be scared?" (3) (You must be logged in to answer)

I don't think you have much to worry about. Make sure you document on a calandar the time you have him while you are separated so it shows a pattern.

Now, yes, worse case scenario she could get crappy advice that she doesn't have to send the child until a court tells her she has to - but that only happens when they think you are a threat, and will do the same thing - I don't see that as a probability in this - it sounds as if although you are splitting, the two of you both realize how important it is for your son to be a big part of both of your lives...

Since NJ doesn't recognize legal separation, the sooner you two file and get a temp agreement in place, the better.

by spaznskitz 7745 Posts
Posted on 3/11/2009 12:18 PM

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I hate to sound negative but i'd say be wary and like in the previous post try to have every detail already worked out. Personally i've seen too many of my friends who really are good dads go into court and get jerked around where the kids are concerned, and I still believe that most are biased towards men. Make sure your parenting plan addresses everything ahead of time, like holidays, how to handle communication etc. Try to make sure it's what you both want and can live with. Sometimes (often) things change when lawyers and finances are involved

by flap38 17 Posts
Posted on 3/11/2009 9:47 AM

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You both seem to be putting your son first and are being fair on visitation. Why would anything change? I think it's great that the two of you are being so caring and responsible to see that each get equal time with your son.

Have you tried marriage counseling to see if that will help? I will add that if you do go to court it will help a lot if you already have a parenting plan in place and go in with everything already agreed to. The less lawyers and judges have to get involved in the nitty gritty of your lives the easier it will be on all of you.

by trisha9054 4967 Posts
Posted on 3/11/2009 7:54 AM

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