How is a decision made regarding who leaves the house while divorce is pending??

When we go to court on the 13th, the GAL has told us we need to have a separation plan. How is this determined??

-I have already said he can keep the home....I can't afford it. But he needs to buy me out (including the equity he "stole")

-I can be the person who leaves, but I will not go without my children and fair child support. I work part time and would need the support to live.

-Does my not being able to stay in the house make it less likely that I will get custody of my children??? I am looking for house rfentals in the same town as their school. Do I need to already have a place to move into???

How does this part work?? I am getting scared now.Is there any chance that he will have to move out while the divorce is pending? Then he can move back in after when we have settled this???

I think I am panicking because he just sent me ANOTHER 6 page email about why he's so mad and that I am breaking up this home and will never make it on my own. You can hear the anger in his writing, and he keeps going back 10 years ago when I had my first child and I used him and why am I doing this..etc..etc...It makes my stomach so sick. He is so mad! I want to talk to him about telling the kids together, but he is so so angry..he keeps turning it around to how can I do this?? He is also constantly calling me a freelaoder now. I have been taking care of 5 kids for 7 years and he tells me I am leeching off of him. using his heat, lights etc. ((I don't ever eat the food he buys)

I think I'm starting to lose it guys!!

by 5babemom 366 Posts
Posted on 1/6/2009 1:58 PM

Get Alerts!

send to friend

Send to a friend

How is a decision made regarding who leaves the house while divorce is pending?? on divorce360.com

E-mail: Separate multiple addresses with commas(,)

From (Your name) :

Your e-mail address:

0	Flag item :: Why are you flagging item: Submit \| Cancel

Tags: custody , support , verbal abuse
See more posts in Maine

Answers for "How is a decision made regarding who leaves the house while divorce is pending??" (4) (You must be logged in to answer)

Do you have the comprehensive parenting plan. Ask Spaz for it. I don't know where to find it.

Good luck to you with this. Stay strong, stand firm, and hold your ground for you and your children.

by lgoodgal 1036 Posts
Posted on 1/7/2009 7:22 PM

	0	Flag item :: Why are you flagging item: Submit \| Cancel

Thank you thankyou!

feeling so much more in control!

by 5babemom 366 Posts
Posted on 1/7/2009 4:45 AM

	0	Flag item :: Why are you flagging item: Submit \| Cancel

hey ! listen to spaz on this!when me and my ex split up,my ex wanted me to go and leave our child there with him.i told my ex go to hell!im the one who takes care of our child,not u!i worked third shift ,six days a week.when i moved out with our child.we moved in with my mom and i worked from 12 midnight until 8 am.i had more time with my child on third shift.i only worked 8 hours.well my ex tried to take our child away from me cause i worked third,i talked to my laywer and he said that i would be paying my ex child support.so i quit my job!i wasnt giving up my child!u have to be one step ahead of your ex.like i said write down when your ex harass u.if your ex calls u and gives u a hard time write it down.put the day and time,date.your ex is trying to run u out!stand your ground dont let him scare u!the only reason i left is cause the house we lived in,we rented.i hope that it gets better for u,shy

by shy 90 Posts
Posted on 1/6/2009 11:52 PM

	0	Flag item :: Why are you flagging item: Submit \| Cancel

GAL said you need a plan - not a fully banged out agreement. You have to have an idea on what you want to do. If you need your portion of the equity before you can move, so be it. Just have an idea in mind of where you plan on going and your expenses...as that is going to affect the decision on custody.

who gets custody largely depends on who has been the children's primary care giver thus far - who has been doing the most (and can prove it), who can keep the children with the least disruption to their normal lives.

It's going to be an arguement as to who stays in the home during the divorce proceeding - I won't even take a side on this one without being privy to the full case. If you have been the primary caregiver of the kids, there is a chance the judge will order you the allowance of use of the home for now....but since you can't afford it, even with temp support ordered, maybe not.

Stop reading his e-mails. Just print them off and give them to your attorney. He's harassing you and if it continues, get a restraining order.

by spaznskitz 7745 Posts
Posted on 1/6/2009 7:54 PM

	0	Flag item :: Why are you flagging item: Submit \| Cancel

Divorce360.com is not a substitute for advice from a lawyer, accountant, financial planner, therapist or other professional to obtain advice. Divorce360.com is not intended to, and should not, take the place of professional advice. The opinions expressed in the divorce360.com message boards are those of the author and the author alone. Divorce360.com does not endorse any specific product or service.