Co-owning the current family home after divorce for the benefit of daughter.

Anyone have advice on this? I'm researching the idea of keeping my daughter in our current home so that she does not get upset by having to move from the only home she has ever had. In this scenario her father and I would come and go instead of her. Neither my soon-to-be-ex nor I can afford to "comfortably" keep the house on our own. Neither of us want to take money from 401K or other retirement/investment funds to buy one or the other out either. I know there would be a lot of logistics involved.

by silvergal 3 Posts
Posted on 12/21/2008 6:25 PM

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Answers for "Co-owning the current family home after divorce for the benefit of daughter." (4) (You must be logged in to answer)

This seems like a bad idea. If you have decided to divorce then you need to start living your separate lives. The divorce itself is what is bad for the children, not where they live. Home is where the heart is, so they say.

by BayViewDad 8 Posts
Posted on 12/22/2008 5:58 PM

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In my legal career- I've had three clients try this - and every single one of them ended in total disaster. I've come to the point that I will not take on a client that is demanding this option, or will I fight for it if it comes up.

People move, kids adapt. It happens every day to millions of families due to work, school, military, divorce...etc.

All that ends up happening in the "keep the home" scenario is that the child ends up inthe middle of a whole lot of adult drama they don't deserve to be on the front lines of when the reality of the two spouses moving on with their lives really comes into fruition.

One of my client's children actually ended up in foster care for three weeks because all of the adults ended up in a brawl on the front lawn over "boyfriends & girlfriends" a year into the arrangment - and they ended up having to sell and get seperate homes anyway in the end.

by spaznskitz 7745 Posts
Posted on 12/22/2008 5:39 PM

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Thanks for the post...I've thought about all that. Yes, we both agree already on many of those things. But there is no guarantee...after all he has a fabulous track record for telling lies and being deceitful. He's not trustworthy any more, so I don't rely on that. Still much to be thinking about in this decision. Just wanting to see if anyone has done this before.

by silvergal 3 Posts
Posted on 12/22/2008 10:16 AM

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i've heard of this and am interested in how it would work out. naturally, you would have to have a fabulous relationship with your ex to make this work. and you'd have to have a serious discussion about ground rules. what if you come home and find he has a girlfriend there, sleeping in your bed? what if he comes home and you just didn't feel like cleaning the house or having any food ready? what if you come home and find he has left his laundry all over? would it be like still being married?

by paula1 12662 Posts
Posted on 12/22/2008 9:12 AM

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